


Dear Whoever You May Be

by idmakeitbehave



Category: Criminal Minds (US TV)
Genre: Dialogue-Only, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Meet-Cute, Mentioned Past Drug Use, Mostly Fluff, Sassy!Spencer, Texting, alternate universe in which spencer knows how to text, anything's possible it's my alternate universe and you're all just living in it, but also oblivious!spencer, librarian!reader, like.... really afar, no serious warnings but reader has a colorful vocabulary, pining from afar, spencer's an idiot and penelope is the best best friend, text fic, the slowest slow burn to ever burn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-29
Updated: 2020-12-09
Packaged: 2021-03-08 03:54:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 18
Words: 28,032
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26709334
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/idmakeitbehave/pseuds/idmakeitbehave
Summary: "(12:14)It’s October 1st now.(12:15)Officially spooky season.(12:17)Goodnight spooky stranger. I hope you don’t turn out to be a ghost."***Spencer sends a text to the wrong number by accident. What happens next is something he could never see coming.
Relationships: Spencer Reid/Reader
Comments: 505
Kudos: 1288





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is an all-dialogue fic which is not everyone's cup of tea and this trope has been done in quite a few fandoms, but I wanted to have a go at it. It might be a disaster, and it is most certainly self-indulgent but maybe someone will enjoy it. This is my crack AU and we're all just living in it, so let's see what happens.
> 
> Penelope and Derek will make an appearance in later chapters, because we love them.
> 
> EDIT: fic playlist here https://open.spotify.com/playlist/4TogzbPlQfZXuH6zzmf8KN
> 
> Spencer | _Reader_

**Wed 30 Sept (11:51pm)**  
It’s almost time. We need to start planning.  
(11:53)  
Did you know that prior to 1500 AD the word hallow actually referred to a saint? Kind of ironic how the meaning of Halloween has changed since then. Guess we can blame Vallancey’s misrecording- the importance of fact checking!

(11:57)  
_ I…. actually did know that. I’m kind of surprised someone else knows about my friend Charles. I’m going to guess that you’ve read Morton’s book on the history of Halloween? _

(11:59)  
Garcia?

(12:00am)  
_...no. Morton? _

(12:02)  
You’re not Penelope.

(12:03)  
_ Nope. _

(12:04)  
I am so sorry, I must have the wrong number.  
(12:05)  
Oh no, and it’s so late, I really am so sorry to bother you.

(12:06)  
_ Who said you were bothering me? I love a nameless faceless person who can throw some good Halloween facts at me. _  
(12:07)  
_ So did you read Morton’s book or not?? You’re killing me with the suspense here. _

(12:08)  
I did. There’s quite a bit of fascinating history surrounding Halloween- I’ll read anything about it I can.

(12:10)  
_ One day when it’s not 12:10 in the morning we’re going to talk about this more. _

(12:11)  
Um, okay?

(12:12)  
_ Don’t um me. You’re the one who texted a random number at midnight on September 30th talking about HALLOWEEN. _

(12:14)  
It’s October 1st now.  
(12:15)  
Officially spooky season.

(12:17)  
_ Goodnight spooky stranger. I hope you don’t turn out to be a ghost. _

_ ****** _

**Fri 9 Oct (11:21pm)**  
_ Jack-o-lanterns were originally carved into turnips. _

(11:32)  
Who is this?

(11:34)  
_ Your wrong number from last week. Don’t tell me you’ve forgotten me already! _  
(11:35)  
_ I figured it was my turn for a random fact. _

(11:38)  
It’s actually impossible for me to forget. I was mostly just hoping you would answer with your name.

(11:40)  
_ You could have just asked. _

(11:41)  
Sorry, I don’t know the proper protocol for talking to a stranger whose number you texted by accident.

(11:43)  
_ Ah, so you’re one of THOSE people. _

(11:44)  
...what people?

(11:46)  
_ Protocol people. _

(11:47)  
I wasn’t aware of the fact that such a designation existed. Protocol is generally pretty important- it’s protocol for a reason.

(11:49)  
_ Rules are mostly made to be broken. _

(11:50)  
Douglas MacArthur.

(11:52)  
_ Spooky AND knowledgeable? *swoon* _

(11:53)  
Swoon?

(11:54)  
_ Oh man. You, good person, gotta get with the times. _

(11:57)  
Hey! I know what swoon means in reference to Middle English. I’m just not used to it in the texting realm.

(11:59)  
_ Oh no. Please tell me I am not talking to an 80 year old man whose grandkids just taught him how to use the iPhone with the big text. Please. _

(12:03am)  
I’d like to think that I text at least a little bit faster than an 80 year old. Although according to Garcia, it might be a pretty close tie.

(12:05)  
_ Ah yes, the mysterious Garcia. I’m assuming you were able to get in contact with them? _

(12:08)  
Yes. Her handwriting is hard to read- it’s so loopy!

(12:09)  
_ Wow, and you judge people based on their handwriting. You’re sounding more and more like a crotchety old man to me. _

(12:12)  
It is factually proven that you can tell a lot about a person from their handwriting.

(12:14)  
_ Of course you know that. Why do you know that? _

(12:17)  
It’s interesting!  
(12:18)  
Also helpful for my job.  
(12:18)  
Wait, why am I the one giving you personal information when you haven’t told me your name?

(12:19)  
_ You haven’t told me yours either. And you didn’t really ask. _  
(12:19)  
_ Crotchety old man. _

(12:21)  
Wow. You’re stubborn.

(12:22)  
_ And you are? _

(12:25)  
….Spencer.

(12:26)  
_ I hope you’re not lying to me Spencer. That would be a very good choice for an alias. Especially if you’re an 80 year old man. _

(12:27)  
Are you implying I have the name of an elderly man?

(12:28)  
_ Only if you’re an old man. _

(12:30)  
I’ll pretend that that makes it better. Care to share yours now?

(12:31)  
_ Y/N. _

(12:32)  
Nice to meet you.

(12:33)  
_ You’re a strange one, Spencer. _

(12:35)  
...thank you?

(12:36)  
_ You’re very very welcome. _

******

**Mon 12 Oct (10:30pm)**  
_ What are you planning? _

(10:38)  
Hello to you too, Y/N.

(10:39)  
_ Hello old man. _  
(10:40)  
_ What are you planning? _

(10:42)  
I don’t know if I know what you’re asking.

(10:43)  
_ Your first text to me. You needed to start planning? _  
(10:44)  
_ I’m just trying to make sure you’re not a sociopath planning your Halloween murder spree. _

(10:47)  
Statistically, most serial killers are actually psychopaths.

(10:48)  
_ Alright, so not helping. _

(10:51)  
We’re planning our annual Halloween party. We kind of go all out.

(10:53)  
_...I’m going to choose to believe you. _

(10:55)  
Good, because it’s the truth.

(11:01)  
_ Sounds like exactly what a serial killer would say. _

(11:04)  
I feel like you need to go to bed. Sleep deprivation lowers inhibition and enhances impulsivity, making people say things they normally wouldn’t.

(11:10)  
_ Wow! Talk about trying to change the subject. Or get rid of me. _  
(11:11)  
_ Bold of you to assume that I’m not always like this. Also, I unfortunately can’t sleep on the job. Duty calls. _

(11:15)  
At 11pm?

(11:18)  
_ Knowledge knows no time. _

(11:21)  
What exactly do you do for work?

(11:23)  
_ Hm… I don’t know if I can give that much personal information to someone who may or may not be an 80 year old serial killer. _

(11:25)  
Okay, so now I’m both 80 and a murderer?! I’m glad you think so little of me.

(11:27)  
_ Only the best for the voiceless stranger on the other end of this phone who could literally be anyone. _

(11:28)  
...Fair.

(11:35)  
_ Okay, let’s compromise. You get three guesses at what I do for work. _

(11:37)  
Three?

(11:38)  
_ Take it or leave it, Spencer. _

(11:41)  
Fine, fine. Okay… guess one….  
(11:42)  
Museum archivist?

(11:45)  
_ Wow, why do you have to guess something so much cooler than the truth? _

(11:48)  
I’m sure that’s not true.  
(11:48)  
Okay. Um… professor? With ridiculous office hours?

(11:51)  
_ A swing and a miss. _

(11:54)  
I’m stumped.

(11:55)  
_ One more gueeeeeesssssss. _

(11:58)  
Ugh, okay. Book editor?

(11:59)  
_ Once again, way too cool. Kind of closer? Kind of not? _

(12:01am)  
That’s wildly clarifying.

(12:03)  
_ Never said I was eloquent. _

(12:08)  
….You’re not going to tell me?

(12:09)  
_ That wasn’t part of the deal. _

(12:10)  
You’ve got to be kidding me.

(12:12)  
_ Ugh fine, you’ve convinced me. _  
(12:12)  
_ I’m a librarian. _

(12:14)  
Okay, that’s pretty on-level with museum archivist for cool-factor.

(12:16)  
_ You’ve just confirmed my suspicions that you’re 80 years old. _  
(12:16)  
_ ‘Cool-factor’  _

(12:17)  
I compliment your profession and you insult me!  
(12:18)  
What library is open at midnight?

(12:25)  
_ University libraries. I am absolutely not going to tell you which one. _

(12:26)  
Again, fair.  
(12:27)  
I have to go, but I am definitely going to pick your librarian brain one day. It’s fascinating.

(12:28)  
_ I think that’s the first time I’ve heard the word fascinating in relation to my job. _  
(12:30)  
_ Consider me your own personal pocket-librarian. _

(12:31)  
Goodnight, pocket-librarian.

(12:33)  
_ Goodnight, Spencer. _


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, I wasn't expecting this response! Glad you're all into whatever the heck this is going to be! Any and all comments/feedback very much appreciated (even if it's just a keysmash, because let's be real sometimes that's a mood).
> 
> Spencer | _Reader_ | **Penelope**

**Thurs 15 Oct (2:47pm)** **  
**Are comic books still popular amongst the student population?

(3:02)  
 _...you’re making it really hard for me to not make fun of you._

(3:12)  
Sorry?

(3:13)  
 _I just like to give you a hard time._ _  
_(3:15)  
 _To answer your question, they don’t see a lot of action in circulation here just because it’s a university, but when I worked at the public library they went out a lot. The online format is a lot more popular just because of accessibility._

(3:16)  
Interesting. Last year they sold 79.2 million copies, including both print and digital mediums, so it makes sense that they’re still relatively popular.

(3:18)  
 _You’re really not gonna tell me where this came from?? Come on, man!_ _  
_(3:18)  
 _Also, once again… why do you know that?_

(3:23)  
It came up at work. I know the statistics, but I wanted to hear some anecdotal evidence from my pocket-librarian.

(3:26)  
 _Aw, you have me blushing over here, Spencer._ _  
_(3:27)  
 _Wait!_ _  
_(3:27)  
 _What do YOU do for work?????_

(3:36)  
What’s with the plethora of question marks?

(3:38)  
 _You’re dodging my question._

(3:41)  
Fine. Three guesses.

(3:43)  
 _Ugh, a taste of my own medicine._ _  
_(3:43)  
 _Tastes bitter._

(3:45)  
You can’t handle the game?

(3:47)  
 _Wow! Those are fighting words. I can always handle the game._ _  
_(3:48)  
 _Alright, I bet YOU’RE a professor._

(3:51)  
Nope.

(3:52)  
 _Shit._ _  
_(3:52)  
 _Archaeologist?_

(3:55)  
...do archaeologists generally discuss comic books?

(3:56)  
 _I don’t know, do you?_

(3:57)  
One more guess.

(3:59)  
 _Ugh. Fine._ _  
_(4:00)  
 _Statistician?_

(4:03)  
I’m not *that* boring.

(4:04)  
 _Says you._ _  
_(4:08)  
 _Okay, you’re really not going to tell me?_

(4:19)  
I work for the FBI.

(4:20)  
 _You have *got* to be shitting me._ _  
_(4:24)  
 _No?_ _  
_(4:31)  
 _Oh my god. You’re a real life FBI agent?_

(4:35)  
Live and in… well, in text.

(4:36)  
 _Holy shit. It is taking everything I have to not Google you right now._ _  
_(4:36)  
 _Wait._ _  
_(4:36)  
 _Are you allowed to tell me that you’re an FBI agent?_ _  
_(4:37)  
 _Spencer….are you pulling my leg. I swear to god._

(4:40)  
I am not pulling your leg. And I am allowed to tell you, technically speaking.  
(4:40)  
Why are you not looking me up?  
(4:41)  
Also, I may have given Garcia your number just in case I end up dead. I’m sure she’s already looked you up, but I made her promise not to tell me anything.

(4:43)  
 _Oh, so now *I’m* the serial killer? Jesus christ!!_ _  
_(4:43)  
 _I kind of like not knowing everything about you. Looking you up would just ruin the mystery._ _  
_(4:44)  
 _Why did you make Garcia promise not to tell you about me?_

(4:48)  
Same premise. It’s nice to talk to someone with no background knowledge attached.

(4:49)  
 _I’m glad we’re on the same page._ _  
_(4:50)  
 _Oh, wow. You may have a pocket-librarian but I have a pocket-FBI agent. I think I win._

(4:52)  
You’re still pretty neat.

(4:53)  
 _Wow, high praise._ _  
_(4:53)  
 _Also, please don’t end up dead. I would miss my pocket-agent._

(4:55)  
Aw.

(4:57)  
 _I like it when you say aw, Agent._

(4:58)  
Instantaneous regret.

******

 **Fri 16 Oct (1:14pm)** **  
****;) ;) ;)**

 ****(1:17)  
What’s with the winky face emoticons?

(1:18)  
 **Ugh, once again, Boy Wonder, just call them emojis and go.**

(1:21)  
Feel free to explain the winks any time, Penelope.

(1:22)  
 **Just wanted to double check that you reaaaaally didn’t want to know anything about your cute little librarian friend… ;) ;)**

(1:25)  
No!!!  
(1:26)  
You promised.

(1:27)  
 **And I always stick to my promises. Just wanted to make sure you haven’t changed your mind.** **  
**(1:27)  
 **If you do, you know I am but a phone call away. Your all-knowing technological mastermind at your service. I could tell you anything you wanted to know about her. *anything***

(1:30)  
It’s times like these that I understand how you got on the watch-list.

(1:33)  
 **Aw, you flatter me genius. Xoxo**

(1:34)  
Love you, Pen.

(1:35)  
 **You too, Romeo.**

******

 **Wed 21 Oct (8:12pm)** **  
**_You’re awful quiet lately, pocket-agent._

(9:27)  
Sorry.

(9:29)  
 _You don’t need to be sorry. I’m literally a random stranger who keeps texting you._ _  
_(9:30)  
 _I’m probably very annoying- tell me to fuck off and I’ll leave you alone._

(9:35)  
Please don’t.

(9:36)  
 _What’s on your mind?_

(9:40)  
Tough case. It’s been a long couple of days.

(9:41)  
 _Do you want to talk about it?_ _  
_(9:41)  
 _Or I can distract you with my dazzling charm!!_

(9:45)  
...the latter.  
(9:45)  
Please.

(9:46)  
 _Your wish is my command._ _  
_(9:47)  
 _Shit, now I have to think of something._

(9:48)  
Wow, what happened to that charm?

(9:49)  
 _Aw, there’s my sassy little friend._ _  
_(9:49)  
 _I can’t turn it on automatically. Sometimes I have to work for it._

(9:51)  
I don’t believe that.

(9:52)  
 _Is that… is that a compliment, Spencer?_

(9:52)  
Maybe.

(9:53)  
 _I’ll take what I can get._ _  
_(9:53)  
 _Hm…. let’s see…. distraction…. charm…. OH_ _  
_(9:54)  
 _One time, we got a complaint that part of a VHS tape a patron had checked out was taped over._ _  
_(9:54) _  
__Lo and behold- someone had taped over the credits with a video of them playing the xylophone…._ _  
_(9:55)  
 _NAKED_

(9:57)  
You’re making this up.

(9:57)  
 _1st of all, ouch._ _  
_(9:58)  
 _2nd, no. I swear on Poe’s grave that this really happened._

(10:00)  
People still use VHS tapes?

(10:01)  
 _...that’s what you got out of this?_

(10:03)  
Not just that. It was a very amusing story.  
(10:03)  
I find it difficult to convey amusement via text.

(10:04)  
 _Okay, fair._ _  
_(10:04)  
 _You’re an odd duck, Spencer._ _  
_(10:05)  
 _I like it._

(10:08)  
You just told me about a recording of a naked person playing the xylophone and *I’m* the odd duck??

(10:09)  
 _Yes._

(10:10)  
Ugh.  
(10:10)  
Fine.

******

 **Thurs 22 Oct (9:02am)** **  
**_I hope you have a better day today, Spencer._ _  
_(9:03)  
 _I’m here if you need to talk._ _  
_(9:03)  
 _Or if you need a distraction._

(9:27)  
Thank you :)

(9:28)  
 _If all else fails, think about naked xylophone man._

(9:31)  
>:(

(9:34)  
 _Wow, very tech savvy of you, old man._

(9:36)  
It was so nice and pleasant and you just HAD to bring up the naked xylophone player.

(9:38)  
 _It’s just too goddamn easy._ _  
_(9:38)  
 _If I have to live with the mental image every day, I’m bringing you down with me._

(9:41)  
That is one image I do not want to see.

(9:45)  
 _Believe me._  
(9:45)  
 _It’s burned into my retinas._


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahhh thank you every single one of you for reading and for commenting! They all turn me into heart-eyes personified!! Side note: I did mention that there are no serious warning for this story (aside from mention of drug use which I will make sure to specify once we get there), but I did want to add that Reader likes to curse.... quite a bit. That is all. Thanks for reading!!
> 
> Spencer | _Reader_ | **Penelope** | Derek

**Sat 24 Oct (9:49pm)** **  
** He’s texting.    
(9:49)   
And SMILING.

(9:50)   
**???** **  
** (9:50)   
**Pretty sure you *always* smile when you’re texting me. I am an actual ray of sunshine.**

(9:51)   
Not me, doofus.   
(9:51)   
Pretty Boy.

(9:53)   
**Ouch, you wound me! I thought I was your BG PG???**

(9:55)   
Since when did he learn how to text?

(9:56)   
**Honey, I know for a million percent sure that he’s texted you before. I have the receipts to prove it. Aaaallllll of the receipts.**

(9:57)   
Yeah for work! It’s like pulling teeth trying to get more than 2 messages out of him.   
(9:57)   
Remind me never to cross you.

(9:58)   
**Maybe you’re just a shitty dentist, hot chocolate.**

(10:00)   
You’re deflecting…   
(10:00)   
You know something.

(10:01)   
**Angel, I know everything.**

(10:02)   
Spill it.

(10:02)   
**Can’t, I’m sworn to secrecy.**

(10:03)   
You are shit at keeping secrets, mama.

(10:04)   
**Yeah, but I’m good at everything else so that makes up for it.** **  
** (10:04)   
**...wait, don’t distract me. I’m not gonna tell you.**

(10:05)   
Oh yes, you will.

(10:05)   
**Make me ;)**

(10:07)   
You’ll have to wait until I get back. The government reads our texts, you know. Keep it PG, PG.

(10:08)   
**Oh sweet summer child, I AM the government.**

(10:08)   
;) ;)

******

**Sat 24 Oct (9:13pm)**   
_ What’s your costume going to be? _

(9:28)   
Not much for hellos, are we.

(9:30)   
_ Waste of time, might as well get right into it. _

(9:34)   
Fair.   
(9:34)   
Why do you keep texting me?

(9:37) _  
_ _ Um….ouch. I can stop if you want? I just like talking to you. _

(9:40)   
No, that’s not what I meant at all! I’m sorry. Please don’t stop. I like talking to you too.   
(9:41)   
I just thought you’d get bored of me.

(9:43)   
_ I find you anything but boring. _   
(9:43)   
_ So....costume? _

(9:45)   
You’re something else.   
(9:45)   
It’s a surprise.

(9:46)   
_ Does that mean I’m going to get pics!! I better get pics. _ _  
_ (9:46)   
_ Ooh is it a couples costume with the infamous Garcia who apparently knows everything about me? _

(9:47)   
What?   
(9:47)   
No.   
(9:48)   
Garcia and I are *definitely* not a couple. Friend costumes maybe.   
(9:49)   
But no, this one’s a solo costume.

(9:50)   
_ Oh, I see, I bet the FBI has certain protocols about fraternization anyway. _ _  
_ (9:50)   
_ And we all know how you feel about protocols. _

(9:51)   
We are the most platonic of friends, protocol or no protocol.

(9:51)   
_ Good to know ;) _

(9:53)   
Besides, Rossi’s the reason we have fraternization rules in the first place.

(9:55)   
_ Rossi???? _

(9:55)   
...yes?

(9:55)   
_ David Rossi???? _

(9:56)   
Um. Yes?

(9:57)   
_ The author?? _ _  
_ (9:57)   
_ You work with David Rossi the FBI agent turned author turned FBI agent?!!!! _

(9:59)   
Again, yes.

(10:00)   
_ Shut the fuck up!!! _

(10:01)   
Wow, language.

(10:02)   
_ Oh my god. _ _  
_ (10:02)   
_ I apologize sincerely for my fangirling but WTF!! _ _  
_ (10:03)   
_ Sorry, I forgot that you’re 80, you probably don’t know what fangirling is. _

(10:05)   
I’m familiar with the terminology.

(10:05)   
_ I assume we have Garcia to thank for that. _

(10:06)   
...yes.

(10:07)   
_ Ho. ly. shit. David Rossi. _ _  
_ (10:07)   
_ I’ve only read *all* of his books. _

(10:09)   
I will not be telling him that. He’s already got a big enough head as it is.

(10:10)   
_ Spencer! _

(10:10)   
Y/N.

(10:11)   
_ I’m sorry, I’m just losing my mind. _ _  
_ (10:11)   
_ Be cool, Y/N. Be cool. _

(10:14)   
A librarian “fangirling” over an author.   
(10:14)   
Typical.

(10:15)   
_ You’re a brat. _

(10:16)   
And?   
(10:16)   
You love it.

(10:17)   
_ I do. _

******

**Mon 26 Oct (10:27pm)** **  
** What’s the weirdest book title you’ve seen?

(10:40)   
_ Ah, no pleasantries, now you’re getting it! _ _  
_ (10:41)   
_ That’s a fun game. I actually have an album just for occasions like this. _

(10:45)   
An album of odd book titles?

(10:45)   
_ Are you surprised? _

(10:46)   
Not in the slightest.

(10:47)   
_ Need to amuse myself somehow. _ _  
_ (10:48)   
_ Okay, I can’t even make myself type this one out. Photo incoming. _

(10:49)   
That bad?

(10:51)   
_ I think you mean that good. _ _  
_ (10:51)  
[](https://www.flickr.com/photos/idmakeitbehave/50439559107/in/dateposted-public/)

(10:55)   
Oh.   
(10:55)   
Oh wow. 

(10:56)   
_ 1989 was a wild year for books. _ _  
_ (10:56)   
_ Old non-fiction books are a *goldmine* for ridiculous titles and topics. _

(10:59)   
I do appreciate that you use the Library of Congress classification system.   
(11:00)   
The Dewey system has a fair amount of issues. It’s so limited in its categories. Why is there one category for Christianity and one for “other religions”??

(11:01)   
_ I think we know why. Our boy Melvil was a raging racist, classist, sexist, and all around douchecanoe. _ _  
_ (11:01)   
_ I don’t really mean *our*. I claim no ownership of that icky man. _

(11:04)   
Douchecanoe????!

(11:06)   
_ I am expanding your vocabulary. You’re welcome. _

(11:08)   
Christ.

(11:09)   
_ Wow, I just said douchecanoe to a FBI agent. _

(11:10)   
You’re going to get yourself put on a watchlist.

(11:11)   
_ As long as it’s your watchlist, pocket-agent. _ _  
_ (11:12)   
_ Can I share more titles?? I love this game. _

(11:14)   
Please do.

(11:15)   
_ Alright you asked for it. _ _  
_ (11:15)  
[](https://www.flickr.com/photos/idmakeitbehave/50439559042/in/dateposted-public/)  
(11:16)   
_ Is this cheating? This is mainly for the absolutely wild cover art, not the title. _

(11:19)   
I think it counts.   
(11:19)   
Also, wow.

(11:20)   
_ I keep wowing you today, Spencer. I’m on a roll. _ _  
_ (11:20)   
_ Major VeggieTales vibes from this one though. _

(11:23)   
VeggieTales?

(11:24)   
_ You’re kidding. _

(11:25)   
I do not kid.

(11:25)   
_ Okay, now that was just a lie. _

(11:27)   
Are you going to explain the VeggieTales or no?

(11:28)   
_ Are you actually 80?? Or did you just not have a childhood? _

(11:30)   
No comment.

(11:31)   
_ Oh. _ _  
_ (11:31)   
_ I’m sorry. _ _  
_ (11:32)   
_ Anyway!! Back to the lighthearted shit. VeggieTales (which came out in 1993 btw, but became really popular in 1999) is an American Christian computer generated children’s animation. With vegetables. Hence the name. _   
(11:32)   
_ Vegetables that retell Bible stories. _ _  
_ (11:33)   
_ It was originally a video series, but there’s a television series as well. And movies. _

(11:35)   
“American Christian computer generated children’s animation.”   
(11:35)   
Those are certainly all words.   
(11:35)   
Bible stories? With VEGETABLES???

(11:36)   
_ It’s hilarious. _ _  
_ (11:36)   
_ Deeply disturbing, but hilarious. _

(11:40)   
I think you might be the odd duck, Y/N.

(11:42)   
_ Hey! Offensive. _ _  
_ (11:43)   
_ I just like knowing weird shit. _ _  
_ (11:43)   
_ It’s also kind of my job. _ _  
_ (11:43)   
_ Not VeggieTales specifically but. _

(11:46)   
I guess my job could also be summed up as “knowing weird shit.”

(11:47)   
_ Oh, Agent! I love it when you talk dirty. _

(11:48)   
I am never cussing again.

(11:48)   
_ Cussing? _ _  
_ (11:49)   
_ You sweet sweet innocent baby. _

(11:51)   
How can I be a baby if I’m 80?

(11:53)   
_ So you admit it! _ _  
_ (11:53)   
_ Creepy old man! _

(11:56)   
Ugh. No.

(11:56)   
_ How old are you? _

(11:58)   
I was 12 when VeggieTales first came out. Let’s put it that way.

(11:59)   
_ Aw, bitty baby 7th grade Spencer. _ _  
_ (11:59)   
_ Wow, you’re really only a year older than me. And yet you text like my grandma. _

(12:01am)   
Not so much 7th grade.   
(12:01)   
Be nice to your grandma!

(12:02)   
_ 8th? _ _  
_ (12:02)   
_ Oh god, you’re an actual genius, aren’t you. _ _  
_ (12:02)   
_ What grade? Just rip the bandaid. _

(12:05)   
I graduated high school at 12.

(12:06)   
_ Fuck me. _

(12:08)   
Excuse me??

(12:10)   
_ What the hell!! _ _  
_ (12:10)   
_ Actual incredible literal genius. _ _  
_ (12:11)   
_ That’s impressive as hell. Kind of scary, but definitely impressive. _

(12:13)   
Oh.   
(12:13)   
Thank you.   
(12:14)   
I’m not quite used to being complimented on it. It’s mostly just weird.

(12:17)   
_ First of all, I love weird. _ _ Weird is good, weird is great. Life would be extremely boring without weird. _ _  
_ (12:17)   
_ Second of all, AHHHH! Pocket-agent AND pocket-genius??? You really got the short end of the stick with this relationship. _

(12:19)   
Relationship?   
(12:19)   
And don’t sell yourself short.

(12:20)   
_ Unless there’s another word for “talking to a stranger who accidentally texted your number but then you kept talking and now you really enjoy talking to him about everything,” relationship will have to do it. _ _  
_ (12:21)   
_ Although, if there’s another word, I bet you know it. _ _  
_ (12:22)   
_ What else are you hiding from me?? A photographic memory? _

(12:25)   
Eidetic.

(12:26)   
_ God damn it. _ _  
_ (12:26)   
_ What’s your reading speed? It’s going to upset me, but I need to know. _

(12:28)   
20,000 words per minute.

(12:29)   
_ What the fuck!!!! _   
(12:29)   
_ I can’t stand you. _ _  
_ (12:30)   
_ ^said with absolute love. _

(12:32)   
I can’t stand you either, Y/N.

(12:32)   
_ Aw, you really do care. _


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the continued love!! Reader's written without any specific physical characteristics, but there is one photo of the Halloween costume in this one- it's just the best photo of the specific costume I had in mind I could find :)
> 
> Spencer | _Reader_

**Wed 28 Oct (10:12pm)** **  
** _ Is David Rossi going to be at your Halloween party? _   
(10:12)   
_ Is he going to wear a COSTUME?? _

(10:17)   
Oh, I see.   
(10:17)   
You’re just using me to get to Rossi.

(10:19)   
_ He’s a little too old for me, tbh. _

(10:22)   
You could be his fourth wife.

(10:23)   
_ Fourth??? _ _   
_ (10:23)   
_ Guy’s got game. _

(10:27)   
Brilliant FBI agent turned rich author? Statistically speaking it makes sense.   
(10:28)   
Fairly poor retention rate, though.

(10:29)   
_ Hey, you got 2 out of 4 there, don’t sell yourself short. _ _   
_ (10:29)   
_ Unless you have a secret novel and some cash that I don’t know about. _

(10:32)   
Novel, no. But I do have quite a few research papers out there.

(10:34)   
_ Alright, 3 out of 4! _ _   
_ (10:34)   
_ Very charming, Spencer. _

(10:36)   
That is a word that has never been used to describe me.

(10:37)   
_ For real? _ _   
_ (10:37)   
_ I think you’re very charming. _

(10:40)   
You don’t *really* know me.

(10:43)   
_ Wow, ouch. Touche.  _ _   
_ (10:43)   
_ But, I know enough to be charmed. _ _   
_ (10:43)   
_ Take the compliment damn it! _

(10:46)   
Fine.   
(10:46)   
...you’re very charming too.

(10:47)   
_ I know. _

(10:49)   
Why do you always make me regret speaking?

(10:50)   
_ It’s what I do best. _

*****

**Thurs 29 Oct (4:49pm)** **  
** _ When’s your birthday? _

(5:02)   
...why do you want to know?

(5:03)   
_ For science- come on, Scrooge. _

(5:06)   
October 28th.

(5:07)   
_ Scorpio? I don’t believe it. _ _   
_ (5:07)   
_ Wait a goddamn minute…. _ _   
_ (5:07)   
_ YESTERDAY?? _ _   
_ (5:08)   
_ You slimy rat, why didn’t you say anything? _

(5:11)   
It didn’t come up.   
(5:12)   
Stooping real low with the name-calling, Y/N.

(5:14)   
_ You should have made it come up! _

(5:17)   
I didn’t know it would make you so offended.

(5:17)   
_ I would have gotten you something!! _

(5:20)   
...you don’t know where I live.

(5:21)   
_ Or do I?? _

(5:23)   
…

(5:23)   
_ Okay, no, I don’t. But I could have gotten you a virtual something. Here. _ _   
_ (5:24)  
[ ](https://www.flickr.com/photos/idmakeitbehave/50492884472/in/dateposted-public/)

(5:26)   
Oh!   
(5:26)   
Is that your cat? Adorable.

(5:27)   
_ Yep, that’s Edgar. _ _   
_ (5:27)   
_ He’s a brat and I love him. _

(5:30)   
As in Poe?

(5:31)   
_ The one and only. _

(5:36)   
Cats are such interesting creatures. They spend 70% of their life sleeping to conserve their energy. Also, the number of bones they have actually depends on the length of their tail and how many toes they have- it can fall in the range of anywhere from 230 to 250!

(5:37)   
_ Wow, I love it when you talk nerdy to me. _ _   
_ (5:35)   
_ Why don’t you do it more often? _

(5:39)   
Well, people don’t usually want to listen to this stuff.   
(5:39)   
Also it takes a lot of effort to type out and as you so nicely pointed out, I text like your grandmother.

(5:40)   
_ Well, I want to hear whatever nerdy things you have to say. _ _   
_ (5:40)   
_ Feel free to hit me with them. Or Edgar. He loves statistics. _

(5:43)   
This may be the best birthday present ever.

(5:45)   
_ Just you wait until next year, now that I know your birthday. _ _   
_ (5:45)   
_ Slimy rat. _

(5:50)   
Next year?

(5:51)   
_ Unless you get sick of me before then- or have me arrested. _ _   
_ (5:51)   
_ I am fairly annoying. _

(5:53)   
You don’t annoy me.

(5:53)   
_ That feels untrue. _

(5:55)   
It’s more like an amused type of annoyed.   
(5:55)   
It’s endearing.

(5:56)   
_ Wow, Spencer. Cool it with the compliments over here. _

(5:57)   
Sorry?

(5:57)   
_ I’m joking. Absolutely do not cool it. _

(5:59)   
Alright, I will not “cool it.”   
(6:00)   
Whatever that means.

(6:01)   
_ Oh you innocent little baby. _

(6:03)   
Respect your elders.   
(6:03)   
Now that I’m not 80, I’m an infant?

(6:04)   
_ Yes. _ _   
_ (6:04)   
_ Baby. _

(6:05)   
Gross.   
(6:05)   
When’s your birthday?

(6:07)   
_...why? _

(6:08)   
You know mine now, it’s only fair!

(6:09)   
_ Ugh. Fine. _ _   
_ (6:09)   
_ November 20th. _

(6:11)   
Another Scorpio? Interesting.

(6:12)   
_ You had to Google that. No way you knew that. _

(6:13)   
I know a lot of “weird shit” as you so eloquently put it.   
(6:14)   
Astrology is actually pretty interesting- there’s nothing scientific to back it up, but I do enjoy reading about the reasoning behind it. Sometimes it can be surprisingly accurate. Purely by coincidence, but I do see why some people are so into it.

(6:15)   
_ You continue to astound me. _

(6:17)   
In a good way?

(6:18)   
_ Yes. _ _   
_ (6:18)   
_ In the best way. _

*****

**Sat 31 Oct (10:03am)** **  
** Halloween!!!!

(10:47)   
_ You’re cute. _

(10:53)   
I’m just excited. Sue me.

(11:00)   
_ I love it. Do I get to see that costume of yours? _

(11:15)   
Tonight. I haven’t worn it yet.   
(11:16)   
Does that mean I get to see yours?

(11:29)   
_ Oh hell yeah. I’m wearing it at work right now. Best part of the job, honestly. _ _   
_ (11:30)   
[ ](https://www.flickr.com/photos/idmakeitbehave/50492691302/in/dateposted-public/) _   
_

(11:35)   
Wow that’s….   
(11:36)   
Incredible. You made that?

(11:39)   
_ Yes, I did. Sorry not sorry for the no-face thing. Can’t ruin the mystery, but you needed to see Liz. _

(11:45)   
I love it. Very on-brand for a librarian.

(11:51)   
_ I could take that as an insult, but I think I know you well enough to know that that’s a compliment. _

(11:55)   
That is correct.

~

(8:47pm)   
Are you ready??

(8:50)   
_ Spencer. I was born ready. _ _   
_ (8:50)   
_ Do you even know how to send photos? _

(8:53)   
Hey! Yes I do, thank you very much.   
(8:53)   
And yes, Penelope did teach me.   
(8:59)   
[ ](https://www.flickr.com/photos/idmakeitbehave/50492691292/in/dateposted-public/)   


(9:02)   
_ Ooh fancy witch? And is that… a wig or your actual hair? _

(9:04)   
Yes, that’s a wig. (I can hear your relief from over here)

(9:05)   
_ I LOVE it. A classic. _

(9:07)   
It’s not nearly as put together as yours, but it’ll have to do.

(9:08)   
_ No way, you look fantastic. Especially the face- very cute. _

(9:09)   
You’re so rude.

(9:11)   
_ What are you going to do about it? _ _   
_ (9:12)   
_ Enjoy your party, pocket-agent. _

(9:15)   
Thanks, Y/N :)

~

(11:13)   
I looooooove Halloween. It’s so great!!   
(11:13)   
Everyone can be whatever they want to be.   
(11:18)   
It’s a uniquely Amrricsn holiday. Despite the Samhin organs   
(11:18)   
Orgins   
(11:18)   
Damnit.

(11:27)   
_ Whoa there, Agent. How much have you had to drink? _

(11:35)   
Enough?

(11:37)   
_ Sounds about right. How goes the party? _ _   
_ (11:38)   
_ What’s Rossi’s costume!!! You need to tell me. _

(11:59)   
Italian chef.   
(12:00am)   
Predictable.

(12:02)   
_ You can spell predictable but not origins? _ _   
_ (12:02)   
_ I love it. _

(1:24)   
I love Halloween!!!   
(1:24)   
Nd you.   
(1:25)   
I love talking to you.

(1:38)   
_ I love talking to you too, pocket-agent. _ _   
_ (1:38)   
_ Enjoy your party and get some sleep or you’re going to have one nasty hangover. _ _   
_ (1:39)   
_ Happy Halloween :) _

*****

**Sun 1 Nov (12:27pm)** **  
** I’m never drinking again.

(1:16)   
_ That sounds like a lie. _ _   
_ (1:17)   
_ I’m glad you enjoyed yourself. I am a little upset, however, that I didn’t get a photo of David Rossi dressed like an Italian chef. _

(1:30)   
I think he would actually murder me.   
(1:31)   
And he knows how to make it look like an accident.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, thank you for the love and feedback!
> 
>  **Content Warning**  
>  This chapter contains a brief non-graphic mention of **drug use & addiction**  
> (Additionally, there's implied past death of a parent (Reader's father) that isn't discussed yet but will be briefly touched upon in future chapters)
> 
> Spencer | _Reader_

**Wed 4 Nov (9:43pm)** **  
**_I’m bored._

(9:48)  
Hi bored.

(9:50)  
 _Oh, you got jokes now??_

(9:51)  
Always.

(9:52)  
 _Let’s do a Q &A. _

(9:53)  
Slow night at the library?

(9:53)  
 _Yep. These goddamn undergrads and their Google. They don’t need me tonight._

(9:55)  
Wow, now who sounds like an 80 year old?

(9:55)  
 _Ouch._

(9:59)  
Alright, so what’s this Q&A you speak of?

(10:00)  
 _I ask a question. You give an answer. And switch. Duh._

(10:02)  
Alright, sassy. I’m a little scared.

(10:03)  
 _You don’t need to be scared of me!!_

(10:05)  
Should have told me that a month ago.

(10:06)  
 _Rude._

(10:10)  
What’s your question?

(10:11)  
 _Shit._ _  
_ (10:11)   
_I need to think of the perfect first question...._

(10:13)  
Wow. Ill-prepared, are we?

(10:15)  
 _Rude!!_ _  
_ (10:15)   
_What are you afraid of? Besides me of course ;)_

(10:17)  
Is that your question?

(10:17)  
 _And I thought you were a genius._

(10:18)  
Rude!   
(10:18)   
And the dark.

(10:19)  
 _Why?_

(10:20)  
I thought it was my turn to ask.   
(10:22)   
Fine. Fine. Because of the inherent absence of light!   
(10:22)   
You’re laughing at me. I can’t hear you but I know it. A grown man who’s afraid of the dark.

(10:24)  
 _Spencer, I’m not laughing at you. That’s a completely valid fear._

(10:25)  
Oh.

(10:26)  
 _Your turn._

(10:27)  
What’s your favorite quote from your favorite book?

(10:27)  
 _Asking a librarian to pick a favorite. Now that’s just cruel. That’s like asking a parent to pick a favorite child._

(10:29)  
Do you need a safe word to opt out?

(10:30)  
 _No! Sh, I’m thinking._ _  
_ (10:31)   
_“All grown-ups were once children, but only few of them remember it.”_

(10:32)  
The Little Prince.   
(10:32)   
Excellent choice.

(10:35)  
 _Why did you join the FBI?_

(10:39)  
Huh.

(10:40)  
 _What?_

(10:41)  
I don’t know if anyone’s ever asked me why.   
(10:41)   
I guess it kind of just happened. Which I know is a very strange thing to just happen. But ultimately, I wanted to help people. When I was a kid, people always told me I could do anything. And I didn’t know what to do with that. But then I found the BAU.   
(10:42)   
Wow, I’m sorry for the novel of a response.

(10:45)  
 _I promise you don’t need to apologize. I want to know. That’s why I asked._

(10:46)  
:)

(10:48)  
 _Thank you for telling me._ _  
_ (10:48)   
_Your turn._

(10:53)  
What did you study in college?

(10:56)  
 _Human Services and English Literature._

(10:59)  
Interesting choice.

(11:00)  
 _You actually know what Human Services is?_ _  
_ (11:00)   
_Nevermind, you know everything._

(11:03)  
It’s actually impossible for one to “know everything.”

(11:04)  
 _Shut up._

(11:05)  
Ouch.

(11:05)  
 _:)_   
(11:07)   
_What degrees do you have? Because I know you absolutely have more than one._

(11:10)  
BAs in Psychology, Sociology, and Philosophy. PhDs in Mathematics, Chemistry, and Engineering.

(11:12)  
 _Wow. I guess I should call you Doctor pocket-agent. I would hate you if I didn’t like you so much._

(11:13)  
Thank you?

(11:14)  
 _You’re welcome._

(11:17)  
What’s your best childhood memory?

(11:24)  
 _Oh._ _  
_ (11:25)   
_When I was 5, my dad brought me and my sister outside past our bedtime. He wanted to show us something. He was so excited._ _  
_ (11:25)   
_We sat on the top of our treehouse and he set off fireworks. They were beautiful._ _  
_ (11:26)   
_And he caught the fucking field behind our house on fire. The entire fire department had to come and put it out._ _  
_ (11:26)   
_It was hilarious. And magical and lovely. I’ll remember that moment until the day I die._

(11:30)  
Aw, your dad sounds like a character. That’s sweet.

(11:34)  
 _Yeah, he was._ _  
_ (11:35)   
_If you weren’t in the FBI what else would you do?_

(11:38)  
Don’t laugh.

(11:39)  
 _I’ll try my best._

(11:42)  
I always imagined myself on a farm of some sort. With cows, chickens, maybe some sheep.

(11:44)  
 _Oh, I *love* that._ _  
_ (11:44)   
_You are full of surprises._

(11:49)  
What about you?

(11:52)  
 _I’ve always had this sort of dream of writing a children’s book._

(11:54)  
I could certainly see you doing that.

(11:55)  
 _Wow, that might be the nicest thing you’ve ever said to me._

(11:57)  
You’d need to tone down the swearing, however.

(11:58)  
 _And there he is._ _  
_ (11:58)   
_Ooh what’s a fun hobby of yours? I love hearing about people’s hobbies._

(12:00am)  
I play chess quite a lot and I knit occasionally. Also reading. A lot of reading.

(12:01)  
 _Well with that reading speed, of course you do!_ _  
_ (12:01)   
_I knit too! I love this, just us two old folks._

(12:02)  
What’s your favorite item you’ve made?

(12:04)  
 _Hm… hard. Probably my musical note scarf._ _  
_ (12:04)   
_What was your hardest case?_

(12:07)  
Oh.

(12:08)  
 _You don’t need to answer if you don’t want to._

(12:10)  
No, it’s okay. There’s just a lot. They’re all hard in their own ways.   
(12:11)   
I guess the obvious answer would be the time a few years ago when I was kidnapped by an unsub.

(12:12)  
 _Holy fuck, Spencer. I am so sorry. That must have been horrifying, I don’t even have the words._ _  
_ (12:12)   
_Unsub?_

(12:13)  
Unknown subject- the unidentified person whose crimes we’re investigating.

(12:14)  
 _Do you want to talk about it?_

(12:16)  
I thought it was my turn to ask.

(12:17)  
 _Yeah, but you can tell me about it if you want to. Or not if you don’t want to. Whatever you want._ _  
_ (12:17)   
_I just- I don’t like seeing my friends hurting. And I know how it feels to keep something horrible inside. It hurts like hell._

(12:18)  
I-   
(12:20)   
It was excruciating and terrible more than just physically. It hurt. It still hurts. And it left me with a nasty coping mechanism that I allowed to get out of hand. It took me quite a while to move past it. Sometimes I still feel like I'm trying to move past it.   
(12:20)   
Coping mechanism isn’t the right term. Addiction.   
(12:21)   
For a while, I wasn’t sure I was glad that I made it out.   
(12:21)   
Alright, I guess we’re having honesty hours over here.

(12:22)  
 _Oh, Spencer._   
(12:22)   
_Thank you for trusting me enough to tell me. Addiction is a nasty beast. I’ve seen how hard it can be to overcome. I'm so proud of you._ _  
_ (12:23)   
_I am so glad you’re still here. That you made it out._

(12:25)  
Me too.   
(12:25)   
It feels strange to say it and actually mean it. But I do.

*****

 **Sun 8 Nov (4:27pm)** **  
**It’s strange.

(5:12)  
 _What’s strange?_

(5:16)  
That it’s not strange.

(5:17)  
 _You’re gonna have to elaborate a little more._

(5:19)  
I’ve just… I’ve never told anyone what I told you the other day. Not really.   
(5:20)   
And it’s strange how it was so easy to tell you.   
(5:20)   
I *wanted* to tell you. And I’m not used to that.

(5:23)  
 _Oh, pocket-agent. I’m so glad you could tell me. Like I said, it hurts when you hold it in. I get it._ _  
_ (5:23)   
_Also, I love you commenting on a conversation 4 days later. Needed time to ruminate, huh?_

(5:27)  
You’re impossible.

(5:29)  
 _Impossibly wonderful._

(5:31)  
Kind of, yeah.

(5:34)  
 _Whoa, easy there. I’m gonna get a big head._

(5:35)  
:)

(5:35)  
 _(:_


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's heating up..... the next chapter is one of my favorites. Something to look forward to :)  
> Thanks for reading and for the feedback! <3
> 
> Spencer | _Reader_ | Derek

**Wed 11 Nov (11:42pm)** **  
**Good evening, pocket-librarian. What makes vampires so popular amongst the young adult crowd?

(11:49)  
 _Your mind is fucking astonishing._  
(11:50)  
 _What in the world brought this up?_

(11:52)  
I’ve just learned about a novel called Twilight. It just made me wonder.

(11:53)  
 _Hold the phone. You *just* learned about Twilight??? The international phenomenon??_ _  
_(11:53)  
 _Wait. How the fuck did this come up at work…._

(11:55)  
You really don’t want to know.

(11:56)  
 _My imagination is running wild and… yeah, I guess I don’t want to know._

(11:58)  
Humanity is… something else. Just when I think I’ve seen it all.

(11:59)  
 _Blergh!!!!! EWWW Spencer!!_ _  
_(12:00am)  
 _Wait I didn’t answer your question. I got distracted by the idea of blood-drinking serial killers._

(12:02)  
To be fair, it’s quite distracting.

(12:03)  
 _Also I honestly don’t really know. I could give you some anecdotal evidence, but my mind is not working right now. The only thing that really comes to mind is the romanticization of them._ _  
_(12:03)  
 _People romanticize the most fucked up things and then everyone eats it UP._ _  
_(12:04)  
 _Not that vampires are the *most* fucked up things…. But like… a 107 year old vampire going to high school is pretty close._

(12:05)  
107?!!

(12:06)  
 _You’ll have to read Twilight one day. It should take you about 3 minutes._

(12:08)  
I don’t know if I want to give up those 3 minutes of my life.

(12:09)  
 _You make a really strong point._

*****

 **Fri 13 Nov (10:57pm)** **  
**_I broke a dictionary today._ _  
_(10:57)  
 _How many years of bad luck is that?_

(11:12)  
Depends. Webster or Oxford?

(11:14)  
 _Webster._

(11:17)  
At least twenty then.

(11:18)  
 _Spencer!!!_

(11:19)  
You asked!  
(11:19)  
Care to tell me exactly *how* you even broke a dictionary in the first place?

(11:21)  
 _It’s not very exciting unfortunately. It was old as shit and I picked it up and it basically disintegrated in my hands._

(11:22)  
I rescind my previous statement. I think that makes it at least thirty years of bad luck.

(11:24)  
 _You’re so rude!_

(11:25)  
I’m not the one who single handedly dissolved an entire book of English language.

(11:26)  
 _Double handedly._ _  
_(11:26)  
 _It was a big book._

(11:28)  
“Was” being the operative word.

*****

 **Tues 17 Nov (4:56pm)** **  
** Who you texting, genius? 

(4:58)  
...you?

(4:59)  
Don’t be a smartass. I can *see* you. 

(5:01)  
Go back to work.  
(5:03)  
Don’t throw shit at me!!

(5:04)  
Oh, he does swear! What’s gotten into you? 

(5:05)  
You’re annoying.

(5:06)  
Don’t make me tell Hotch on you. 

(5:08)  
You wouldn’t.

(5:09)  
...probably not.   
(5:09)  
Just like to make you sweat.   
(5:11)  
Hey, I saw that! Put the bird away. 

*****

 **Fri 20 Nov (8:32am)** **  
**Happy birthday, Y/N!!

(9:14)  
 _Thank you, Spencer :)_

(10:02)  
Anything exciting planned?

(10:10)  
 _Super hot date._

(10:14)  
Oh.

(10:15)  
 _With Edgar._ _  
_(10:15)  
 _Whoa, you jealous over there?_

(10:23)  
No.

(10:23)  
 _You’re a terrible liar._

(10:24)  
Shut up!

(10:27)  
 _Real mature, Agent._ _  
_(10:27)  
 _Anyway, I’m actually going out with a couple of friends from school. Nothing crazy._ _  
_(10:28)  
 _First I need to finish the puzzle I’m working on._

(10:31)  
Crossword?

(10:32)  
 _Jigsaw._

(10:35)  
Oh, excellent.  
(10:36)  
Did you know that the most pieces ever assembled in one puzzle was 209,250 at the Grand Formosa Regent Hotel in Taiwan?

(10:38)  
 _You must realize my answer is no. You are wild._ _  
_(10:39)  
 _Also, the idea of doing a puzzle that large is absolutely *horrifying*_

(10:40)  
I wouldn’t say horrifying.

(10:41)  
 _Oh shut up, you would have it done in like five minutes._

(10:43)  
Maybe ten.

(10:45)  
 _I love when you pretend to be humble._

(10:46)  
Hey!

(10:46)  
 _:)_

(10:48)  
What’s the puzzle you’re working on?

(10:49)  
 _Gimme a minute…_ _  
_(10:53)  
 _And done!_  
[ ](https://www.flickr.com/photos/idmakeitbehave/50531265652/in/dateposted-public/)

(10:55)  
Oh, that’s neat. Also very in-character.  
(10:55)  
Nice bananas.

(10:56)  
 _You would be shocked at the amount of book-themed gifts I receive._ _  
_(10:56)  
 _I knew I should have moved the fruit pre-photo._

(10:59)  
I don’t understand how you know me so well.

(11:01)  
 _Tis both a gift and a curse._

(11:03)  
You’re a strange one.

(11:04)  
 _You say it like it’s a bad thing._

(11:07)  
Oh no, it is certainly not.  
(11:07)  
It is the best thing.

(11:09)  
 _You’re right, I *am* the best thing!!!_

(11:11)  
Ugh.  
(11:12)  
I’m going to let you have this since it’s your birthday.

(11:14)  
 _This may be the greatest gift I’ve ever received._

(11:16)  
I really hope that’s not true.

(11:17)  
 _The world may never know._

*****

 **Sat 21 Nov (1:23am)** **  
**_My friends are making fun of me!!!!_ _  
_(1:25)  
 _Fcking jerks_

(1:45)  
Are you drunk?

(1:54)  
 _Yes! It’s my turn!! It’s my goddamn birthday!!!!_

(1:56)  
I wasn’t judging you.  
(1:57)  
Why are they making fun of you?

(2:13)  
 _They think I’m crazy for talking to you. Even though I told them you can’t be a serial killer._ _  
_(2:15)  
 _Well, I guess you still could…… jury’s out._

(2:18)  
You told your friends about me?

(2:29)  
 _Duh._ _  
_(2:31)  
 _I’m kind of obsessed with you, they were gonna catch on eventually._ _  
_(2:35)  
 _Fuck,forget I said tht._

(2:37)  
Sorry, you know I cannot.  
(2:38)  
You’re adorable.

(2:54)  
 _That is false!!!!_ _  
_(2:55)  
 _Besides, you don’t even know what I look like. I could be a bridge troll for all you know._

(2:59)  
It doesn’t matter what you look like, you’re adorable.  
(3:04)  
Happy birthday, Y/N. Drink some water and get some sleep.

(3:16)  
 _You’re just saying that because I’m drunk and you think I won’t remember! No way you would say that in real life._ _  
_(3:16)  
 _I know you!!!!_ _  
_(3:17)  
 _Well… kinda._

(3:19)  
Fair theory. I won’t argue with that.  
(3:19)  
Goodnight :)

(3:21)  
 _GOODNIGHT!!!_ _  
_(3:21)  
 _Dingus :)_

~

(5:12pm)  
 _Waaaaaahhhhh._

(5:47)  
Did you just sleep for 14 hours? That has to be a record.

(5:53)  
 _Everything hurts._

(5:58)  
The price of the party.

(6:01)  
 _You strike me as someone who gets drunk like maybe twice a year. What do you know about this “party”?_

(6:05)  
Fair.  
(6:06)  
Have a good night?

(6:12)  
 _Aside from being *totally* embarrassing, hell yeah._

(6:14)  
What do you mean?

(6:17)  
 _Oh do not play dumb with me, genius. I know you remember what I said to you._

(6:20)  
Oh, you mean about being obsessed with me?  
(6:21)  
Yeah, I do remember that.

(6:25)  
 _You’re an asshole!!!!_

(6:28)  
You’re still adorable.

(6:33)  
 _Ugh. I am never drinking again._

(6:35)  
As someone fairly smart once told me, that sounds like a lie.

(6:37)  
 _Fairly smart?_ _  
_(6:38)  
 _Now you are just attacking me at my weakest. Mean. Mean man._  
(6:38)  
 _Once I’m able to move again, I’d be very worried if I were you._

(6:41)  
:)

(6:43)  
 _There’s no way you’re this mean in real life._

(6:45)  
The world may never know.

(6:47)  
 _Man, and using my own words against me!_ _  
_(6:47)  
 _Why am I obsessed with you? Why do I have such bad taste?_

(6:50)  
So you do admit it!

(6:51)  
 _Shhhhhh. I can’t hear you over the pounding in my head._ _  
_(6:51)  
 _:)_ _  
_**  
**(6:53)  
(:

*****

 **Thurs 26 Nov (12:32pm)** **  
**46 million turkeys are eaten on Thanksgiving. More than Christmas and Easter *combined*

(1:02)  
 _Happy Thanksgiving to you too, Spencer. Keeping it real as always, I see._

(1:05)  
I could give you genocide statistics, but I figured I’d stick with the fowl facts.

(1:08)  
 _How are you so funny without trying to be?_

(1:09)  
Who said I wasn’t trying?

(1:11)  
 _I kind of get the sense that you’re just… you._ _  
_(1:11)  
 _It’s very refreshing._

(1:15)  
Thank you.  
(1:15)  
That’s quite the compliment.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A Halloween gift for y'all. Xoxo <3
> 
>  **Content Warning**  
>  Discussion of death of a parent
> 
> Spencer | _Reader_ | **Penelope**

**Wed 2 Dec (10:27pm)** **  
** Do you like magic?

(10:54)  
_…this feels like a trick question._

(10:57)  
How so?

(10:59)  
_I don’t know.... I guess just because if it was me asking, it probably *would* be._

(11:01)  
You just have to go and make it difficult.

(11:03)  
_I’m wildly entertaining, I know._ _  
_ (11:03)  
_Anyways, yes I do. I’d have to be some kind of monster to not like magic._

(11:05)  
Good to know.

(11:06)  
_Are we talking like magic tricks or wizard magic or rainbows and unicorn magic?_

(11:09)  
Does it change your answer?

(11:10)  
_Absolutely not._

(11:12)  
Very good to know.  
(11:13)  
And all of the above, I suppose.

(11:14)  
_You’re weird._

(11:15)  
And?

(11:16)  
_And I love it._

*****

 **Mon 7 Dec (3:52am)** **  
** _Do you ever get tired of remembering everything?_

(3:57)  
Why are you awake at this hour?  
(3:58)  
And I suppose so. It’s difficult always remembering the worst parts of the job, certainly. Why?

(4:02)  
_Sorry, I shouldn’t have bothered you._

(4:04)  
You’re not bothering me- I’m awake too.  
(4:04)  
You don’t seem like your usual sassy self. Are you alright?

(4:07)  
_I’m tired of remembering._ _  
_ (4:07)  
_And then I started thinking about all of the horrible things you must remember and you have no choice and now I can’t stop crying and I don’t know what to do._

(4:08)  
Remembering what?  
(4:08)  
Y/N, what’s going on? What can I do?

(4:11)  
_I’m fine._ _  
_ (4:11)  
_Okay… that was a lie._

(4:13)  
Can you tell me what’s going on? What’s on your mind?

(4:15)  
_Today’s just a bad day. It’s the day my dad died._

(4:17)  
Oh, I am so sorry. I know there’s nothing I can say to take away that pain, that’s an impossible situation.

(4:23)  
_I found him._

(4:24)  
Oh, Y/N.

(4:27)  
_It’s been more than two decades. I keep thinking I’ll forget it eventually, but if I close my eyes I see it like it was yesterday._ _  
_ (4:27)  
_I can forget it for a while, for a long time really, but as soon as I remember it’s suddenly right there. Today though. It’s like I can’t shut it off._ _  
_ (4:29)  
_I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have dumped that on you, that’s not fair._

(4:30)  
You absolutely don’t need to apologize.  
(4:31)  
Can I call you?  
(4:31)  
I’m going to call you.

(4:32)  
**_~Incoming call~_ ** **_  
_ ** _“S-Spencer?”_

“Hi, Y/N. Is it- is it alright that I called you?”

_“Mhm. I- I wouldn’t have picked up if I didn’t want to talk to you.”_

“There’s my sassy friend.”

_“You have a nice voice.”_

“Oh, um, thank you.”

 _“You didn’t have to call me. I’m sorry for bothering you. It’s just…”_ _  
_ _  
_ “I promise you’re not bothering me. I wanted to- to call you. I feel like this isn’t something that can be really discussed over text. And I, um, I just wanted to make sure that you’re alright. Well, not alright, obviously, but-”

_“Relax, Spence. And you’re very sweet.”_

“I thought I was the one who was supposed to be telling you to relax?”

_“Ha ha, very funny.”_

“Seriously though, I wish I had the right words to say. I just- just know that I care. And I’m here, if you need anything.”

_“Thank you. Really. It’s just- it’s so hard. Everyone always says it will get easier. It’s been so long, for fuck’s sake. But it still hurts.”_

“That kind of thing will always hurt. It’s hard, it’s unimaginable. But the pain gets quieter- it moves towards the background. Hopefully one day you can look back and remember more of the good things than the bad.”

_“....”_

“Are you still there?”

“ _You.”_

“What?”

_“You’re one of the good things.”_

“Oh, Y/N.”

_“I can’t believe we don’t know each other.”_

“What do you mean?”

_“I feel like I’ve known you my entire life.”_

“Me too.”

*****

 **Wed 9 Dec (9:23pm)** **  
** I do get tired.

(9:45)  
_Sorry?_

(9:48)  
Of remembering everything.  
(9:49)  
Sorry it’s just-  
(9:49)  
You were so open and honest with me and I wasn’t entirely honest with you and that doesn’t feel fair.

(9:52)  
_Oh, Spencer._ _  
_ (9:52)  
_I can’t even imagine. Do you want to tell me about it?_

(9:54)  
No, you’re still hurting. I just wanted to explain.

(9:55)  
_I’m still hurting, but that doesn’t mean you can’t too._ _  
_ (9:55)  
_I don’t have a monopoly on pain. I swear, you can tell me. I would tell you if I couldn’t handle it right now._

(10:01)  
We just see a lot of bad things. The worst things really, the worst side of humanity. Day in and day out. And sometimes I don’t know why I do it.  
(10:02)  
Remembering hurts, but I’m scared of forgetting.

(10:04)  
_What do you mean?_

(10:07)  
My mom. She’s schizophrenic. It’s bad sometimes. And I’m just-  
(10:08)  
I’m worried one day I could be her.

(10:11)  
_Oh angel._ _  
_ (10:11)  
_We sure got dealt a shitty hand, didn’t we?_

(10:15)  
Yeah.  
(10:16)  
Sorry, I know this is a lot.

(10:18)  
_Hey! No, you don’t need to be sorry. I asked you to tell me._ _  
_ (10:18)  
_There’s nothing I can really say to make it better, but just know that I believe in you. Spencer, you’re doing this for a reason. You’re a good and kind person. You make a difference in people’s lives._ _  
_ (10:19)  
_Hell, we’ve never even met and you’ve made a difference in mine._ _  
_ (10:19)  
_Someone very special once told me that hopefully one day you can look back and remember more good things than bad._ _  
_ (10:20)  
_The world can be a terrible place, but it can also be beautiful._

(10:23)  
I think I’m starting to see that.

(10:23)  
_I’m glad. You deserve to._

(10:25)  
You do too.

(10:27)  
_My dad always said that if I ever missed him to look up at the moon. He said I would know that he was looking at the same one and we would never really be apart._ _  
_ (10:27)  
_I’d like to think that that’s still true._ _  
_ (10:28)  
_And Spencer?_

(10:29)  
Yeah?

(10:29)  
_Thank you._

(10:30)  
For what?

(10:31)  
_For being you._

*****

 **Sat 12 Dec (12:01pm)** **  
** _Are you at work?_

(12:20)  
No, I have the day off. Don’t jinx it.  
(12:21)  
Why?

(12:27)  
_Do you trust me?_

(12:30)  
This feels ominous.

(12:32)  
_Spencer._

(12:33)  
Fine.  
(12:33)  
Yes, I trust you.  
(12:34)  
Which is absurd seeing as how you could be anyone.

(12:40)  
_I could be anyone, but I happen to be me._

(12:43)  
I suppose that’s accurate?  
  
(12:46)  
_38°54′9.36″N 77°1′22.44″W_

(12:50)  
Are those…coordinates?  
(12:51)  
Oh god, you’re actually trying to kill me.

(12:53)  
_Wow, all that trust- GONE!_

(12:55)  
I have limits.

(12:57)  
_You either trust me or you don’t!_

(1:00)  
Ugh. Fine. Yes, I trust you.

(1:02)  
_Alright, your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to go to those coordinates. Any time between 2 and 8pm._

(1:03)  
And then?

(1:04)  
_Tell me when you’re there and await further instruction._

(1:07)  
You’re scary when you’re bossy.

(1:08)  
_;)_

~

(4:12)  
A library?  
(4:12)  
How in character of you.

(4:15)  
_Are you there?_

(4:19)  
Yes. I’ve been here before.  
(4:20)  
Wait, does this mean you live in DC too? We haven’t discussed this.

(4:22)  
_Sh._

(4:24)  
Is that a yes?

(4:25)  
_Fine, yes._ _  
_ (4:26)  
_I assumed a genius such as yourself has been here before, but humor me. It’s a beautiful building._

(4:28)  
Very true.  
(4:28)  
What are my further instructions?

(4:33)  
_PR6116.O76 G75 2015_

(4:36)  
A call number?  
(4:36)  
Alright, I’m intrigued.  
(4:43)  
?  
(4:43)  
Oh.

(4:44)  
_I’m assuming you found it?_

(4:46)  
[ ](https://www.flickr.com/photos/idmakeitbehave/50549477667/in/dateposted-public/)

(4:47)  
_Good work._

(4:50)  
Wow. I don’t know what to say.

(4:51)  
_I’m guessing you read it in about 2 minutes?_

(4:53)  
4 minutes, 27 seconds. I tried to take my time.

(4:53)  
_Show off._ _  
_ (4:53)  
_What did you think?_

(4:55)  
It’s different.  
(4:55)  
Good different. Very good.

(4:55)  
_Give me a quote._

(4:57)  
“Grief is everything. It is the fabric of selfhood, and beautifully chaotic. It shares mathematical characteristics with many natural forms.” Wow.

(4:59)  
_I thought you might like it._

(5:01)  
Did you put this note in there?

(5:02)  
_Yep. That’s your next clue._

(5:02)  
Wow. You were here.

(5:03)  
_We already covered that I live in DC too._

(5:05)  
I know. It just- it makes you more real.

(5:05)  
_I’m very real, Spencer._

(5:06)  
And I’m very glad you are.

(5:07)  
_Alright, silly- get back to your treasure hunt!! You have some books to find._ _  
_ (5:07)  
_I’m gonna leave you on your own. You can do it._

(5:09)  
Alright?

(5:09)  
_Godspeed._

~

(6:13)  
You got me a coffee?  
(6:13)  
How did you get me a coffee? How did you know how I like my coffee?

(6:15)  
_You seem like a ridiculously sweet coffee kinda guy._ _  
_ (6:15)  
_And I have my ways._

(6:17)  
I’m going to assume by “your ways” you mean the very subtle undergrad working behind the counter.

(6:18)  
_...maybe._

(6:20)  
Using your students in your mission? How duplicitous.

(6:22)  
_“It has long been an axiom of mine that the little things are infinitely the most important.”_ _  
_ (6:23)  
_I just thought you should have something good. Even if it’s just a little thing._ _  
_ (6:23)  
_It worked, right?_

(6:25)  
Sir Arthur Conan Doyle.  
(6:25)  
It very much did.

*****

 **Sat 12 Dec (11:12pm)** **  
** Is it possible to fall in love with someone you’ve never met?

(11:14)  
**SPENCER!!!!!!!**

(11:17)  
Please forget I said that immediately.

(11:18)  
**I absolutely will not.** **  
**(11:18)  
**And yes. I think it is.**


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all of the lovely comments on the last chapter!! I love and appreciate every single one so so much <3
> 
> Side note story time: I started this story a few months before I actually started to post it and almost didn't even publish it because I didn't think anyone would like it! So moral of the story, your feedback and love is THE BEST motivation :)
> 
> Spencer | _Reader_ | **Penelope** | Derek

**Sun 13 Dec (2:09am)** **  
**I’m still thinking about that book.

(2:12)  
 _At 2am?? I’m glad you liked it but you should go to sleep!_

(2:13)  
2am is not late for us and you know it.

(2:15)  
 _That’s fair. I just want you to take care of yourself :)_ _  
_ (2:15)   
_What’s on your mind re:book?_

(2:17)  
It just stuck with me. It’s just- wow. “Grief is a long-term project.”   
(2:18)   
I just realized I never asked you to share your favorite quote.

(2:19)  
 _You know I can never pick just one but…. “_ _She was not busy dying, and there is no detritus of care, she was simply busy living, and then she was gone.”_ _  
_ (2:19)   
_Also the one about the cake tin._ _  
_ (2:20)   
_Why do you have to make me cry at 2am!! I don’t need this shit._

(2:22)  
What? I am so sorry, I didn’t mean to make you cry. I can leave you alone.

(2:23)  
 _I know it’s difficult to read tone via text, but I promise I do not want you to go._ _  
_ (2:23)   
_That book just makes me cry. It makes me sad cry and happy cry and everything in between._

(2:25)  
A lot of emotion packed into a short little book.

(2:26)  
 _Exactly._   
(2:27)   
_Are you close with your parents? I just realized I’ve never really asked you about them._

(2:29)  
My mom yes, my dad not so much. He left when I was really young.

(2:30)  
 _I have a feeling you’re under-exaggerating when you say “not so much.”_

(2:31)  
How can you read me so well via text?

(2:32)  
 _A rare talent._

(2:33)  
And you’re right.

(2:34)  
 _Do you want to tell me about it?_

(2:35)  
I… uh, I think I do.   
(2:35)   
You continue to surprise me.

(2:37)  
 **_~Incoming call~_ ** **_  
_** “Hello?”

_“Hey, Spence. I figured we already ripped the bandaid with the whole talking on the phone thing. Is this okay? I know it’s late, if you need to go-”_

“No, no, this is fine. More than fine. It’s nice to hear your voice again.”

_“Yours too. You even sound cute.”_

“...”

_“Speechless?”_

“You seem to have that effect on me.”

_“Do you still want to talk about it?”_

“I- yeah. I don’t even know where to start though.”

_“How long has it been since you’ve seen him?”_

“A few years, I saw him during a case. Before that though, it had been almost twenty years.”

_“Wow, that’s hard. That’s a long time.”_

“Yeah. He- he left when I was six. He didn’t really… he didn’t say anything. He just left a note.”

_“I can’t even imagine. It must have been so difficult on you and your mom.”_

“Yeah, yeah it was. And I was angry about it- I’m _still_ angry about it. But I was also so sad and so confused. I didn’t understand how he could just walk away like- like we never even existed.”

_“Oh, Spence, I’m so sorry. That’s a terrible thing to try to understand, especially when you were so young.”_

“...”

_“And it’s okay to still be sad about it. Like Porter said, grief is a long-term project. We never really get over something like that, we just learn how to move past it.”_

“I, um…”

_“It’s alright. Take your time.”_

“I- I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to start crying on you.”

_“Spence, you never have to apologize for how you’re feeling. I promise.”_

“I just still feel so guilty. I know it’s irrational, I know I couldn’t have done anything to stop him from leaving, but still. He couldn’t handle my mom and I didn’t really do much to help the situation. I was strange and annoying and- and getting the crap kicked out of me every day.”

_“Hey! None of that. You were a child. Him leaving is on him. A parent’s job is to love you- and that means unconditionally. If you want my unwarranted uneducated opinion-”_

“I do.”

_“He acted like a coward. Like I said the other day, people get dealt shitty hands all the time. The difference is how they choose to handle them. He chose to run away from one of the greatest people I know. You chose to become a FBI agent and save people. It’s all about the choices.”_

“Oh, Y/N.”

_“And Spence?”_

“Yeah?”

_“It is really really his loss.”_

*****

 **Mon 14 Dec (9:32pm)** **  
**_https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mSfH2AuhXfw_  


(11:47)  
And now you’ve gone and made me cry again.

(11:54)  
 _I’ve found you._

*****

 **Tues 15 Dec (11:57pm)** **  
**_Do you believe in magic?_

(11:59)  
Where did this come from?

(12:00am)  
 _Always dodging my questions._ _  
_ (12:00)   
_I do believe you asked me about magic the other week._

(12:02)  
Fair.   
(12:02)   
I do love learning magic tricks and performing them.

(12:03)  
 _I knew you were a magician! It just makes sense._ _  
_ (12:03)   
_Do you have a magic top hat?_

(12:05)  
Unfortunately I do not.

(12:06)  
 _We can fix that._ _  
_ (12:06)   
_You still didn’t answer my question, though._

(12:07)  
What?

(12:08)  
 _So you do magic tricks, but do you *believe* in magic?_

(12:09)  
I- I don’t know. I’m more of a science person, I suppose.   
(12:10)   
Statistics, facts, things that are easily proven.

(12:11)  
 _Hm…._

(12:12)  
Hm?

(12:13)  
 _I’ll get you to believe in magic yet._

(12:15)  
I think you could get me to believe in anything.  
  
*****

 **Wed 16 Dec (10:13pm)** **  
**_I’m trying to think of the next library for your next mission… So many options, so little time._

*****

 **Thurs 17 Dec (6:48pm)** **  
**_You on a case? You gotta let me know so I don’t annoy the crap out of you, remember!_ _  
_ (6:49)   
_At least not more than usual ;)_

*****

 **Fri 18 Dec (9:47am)** **  
**_You out there?_ _  
_ (2:33pm)   
_Pocket-agent?_ _  
_ (7:08)   
_Are you okay?_ _  
_ (9:49)   
_Spencer?_

*****

 **Fri 18 Dec (10:12pm)** **  
****Hi angel, this is Penelope- Spencer’s friend.**

(10:13)  
 _Penelope? Oh my god._ _  
_ (10:13)   
_Is he okay??_ _  
_ (10:13)   
_What happened? He always at least texts me to let me know if he’s on a case but he hasn’t been responding._

(10:15)  
 **He’s doing just fine now, but there was an incident at work. He’s unconscious, but he’s going to be okay, thank goodness. <3** **  
**(10:15)  
 **I just thought you should know. You’re important to him. And I didn’t want you to worry.**

(10:16)  
 _An incident?_ _  
_ (10:16)   
_Thank you, Penelope. I really really appreciate it. I don’t even know what to say right now. I’m just glad he’s going to be okay._

(10:17)  
 **I can’t realllllly give the details- Bureau rules and all that jazz. But our Boy Genius is a fighter.**

(10:18)  
 _He’s incredible._

(10:19)  
 **He sure is.**

*****

 **Sat 19 Dec (9:02am)** **  
** Baby Girl, why is there a giant Edible Arrangement in Reid’s room? 

(9:04)  
 **Wasn’t me…although now I definitely wish it was. Steal me a strawberry!!!**

(9:07)  
I know it’s not you, genius. There’s a card. But I do know that you somehow had a part in this.    
(9:07)   
I am NOT stealing from an unconscious man’s gift basket! That’s too far even for me. 

(9:08)  
 **A card???** **  
**(9:08)  
 **Tell me what it says!!!**

(9:10)  
Wow, Miss Nosy over here.    
(9:10)   
You gotta work on your patience. 

(9:10)  
 **I will END you, Derek Morgan.**

(9:11)  
Whoa whoa whoa.    
(9:11)   
It says “‘What happens when people open their hearts? They get better.’ Edgar and I send our love, pocket-agent. Get better real soon.”    
(9:12)   
Whatever the fuck that means. 

(9:12)  
 **Ohhhhhhhh.**

(9:12)  
What?? 

(9:13)  
 **Two nerds in love, baby.**

(9:15)  
Oh man. 

(9:16)  
 **Oh, my heart!!! Little baby Boy Wonder, all grown up.**

(9:17)  
Kid deserves something good in his life. 

(9:17)  
 **More than anything.**

*****

 **Sun 20 Dec (12:13pm)** **  
**I’m ready for my next mission.

(12:27)  
 _Oh, my pocket-agent. I’ve missed you._ _  
_ (12:27)   
_You scared the hell out of me. How are you feeling?_

(12:31)  
Much better. Thank you for the basket. It was delicious. You really didn’t have to do that.

(12:33)  
 _I’m glad. I assumed that if you like your coffee with more sugar than coffee, you’d enjoy your fruit with more chocolate than fruit._ _  
_ (12:33)   
_I didn’t have to, but I wanted to. Get used to it._

(12:35)  
You’re so stubborn.

(12:36)  
 _You love it._

(12:37)  
Yeah, I do.

(12:40)  
 _Spencer?_

(12:41)  
Yes?

(12:42)  
 _I’m really really really glad you’re alright._

(12:43)  
I’m really really really glad I know you.

(12:44)  
 _Wow, you’re a cheeseball._

(12:45)  
Hey, I just got out of the hospital! Give me a break.

(12:47)  
 _I’m really glad I know you too._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the song linked is You Will Be Found from Dear Evan Hansen :)


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello I love you all, this is your reminder to do at least one nice thing for yourself this week!!
> 
> How are we feeling about the twice a week updates? I was originally going to only do once a week, but the chapters are a lot faster to read than a normal fic, so I figured maybe a little more would be welcome. Xoxo <3
> 
> Spencer | _Reader_

**Tues 22 Dec (10:39pm)** **  
** _How are you feeling?_

(10:45)  
Like I told you yesterday *and* the day before, I am absolutely fine.  
(10:45)  
I appreciate your concern though.

(10:46)  
_Okay, okay. You better not be lying to me!_

(10:47)  
I’m not.  
(10:47)  
I promise.

(10:48)  
_I don’t take promises lightly, you better stick to that._

(10:50)  
Cross my heart.

(10:51)  
_Alright I accept._

(10:52)  
Alright, glad that that’s settled.  
(10:52) **  
** Any festive Christmas plans?

(10:53)  
_Not particularly, just me and Edgar and some hot chocolate. Gonna decorate my sad Charlie Brown tree and that’s about it._ _  
_ (10:54)  
_I’m a much bigger Halloween person than a Christmas person._ _  
_ (10:54)  
_What about you?_

(11:01)  
Visiting my mom :)

(11:03)  
_Aw, that’s super sweet. Is she in DC too?_

(11:06)  
No, she’s in Las Vegas.

(11:09)  
_Whoa, Vegas? How’d that happen?_

(11:10)  
That’s where I grew up.

(11:12)  
_Oh, I guess I never asked you that. You’re a Vegas baby? Wow._ _  
_ (11:12)  
_Do you gamble a lot? You gotta be a card shark with that big brain of yours._

(11:15)  
I’m actually banned from casinos in Las Vegas, Laughlin, and Pahrump because of my card-counting ability.

(11:17)  
_You are absolutely incredible._

(11:20)  
You are far too kind to me.

(11:21)  
_And also kind of scary._ _  
_ (11:22)  
_No, I think it’s just the right amount._

(11:25)  
And there she is.  
(11:25)  
What are you up to then if there’s no festive plans?

(11:26)  
_Well, right now I’m just finishing up an excellent weeding session._

(11:28)  
...gardening? At this hour?

(11:29)  
_Book weeding, dear._

(11:31)  
Oh! Do you use the CREW system?

(11:33)  
_Of course you would know what that is._ _  
_ (11:33)  
_I’m going to restate my previous sentiment for emphasis- you are incredible._

(11:36)  
I just know a lot of weird shit, as you say.

(11:37)  
_Technicalities._ _  
_ (11:37)  
_Wanna see some fun things I found in my weeding adventures?_

(11:40)  
Always.

(11:41)  
_Excellent. I have three standouts._ _  
_ (11:42)  
[](https://www.flickr.com/photos/idmakeitbehave/50574706892/in/dateposted-public/)

(11:45)  
Wow. I have not seen one of those in a long time.  
(11:46)  
I miss them.

(11:48)  
_You are so weird._

(11:49)  
What else do you have for me?

(11:50)  
_Wow, Agent. So informal._

(11:51)  
It’s late, give me a break.

(11:52)  
_It is barely late. Did we not just recently discuss this? I know for a fact you are a night owl just like me._

(11:54)  
Are you not going to continue sharing?

(11:55)  
_Okay, okay. Patience is not your strong suit, I see._

(11:55)  
Ugh.

(11:56)  
_Relax, man._  
[](https://www.flickr.com/photos/idmakeitbehave/50574572436/in/dateposted-public/)

(11:59)  
Wow. That piece of paper is older than me.

(12:01am)  
_Oh yeah, it’s 15 days your elder!_ _  
_ (12:01)  
_Isn’t that insane??? I find the coolest old stuff abandoned in books._

(12:04)  
Do you have a collection?

(12:05)  
_I’m hurt that you even have to ask._

(12:05)  
You’re right. You have an album of strange book titles. Of course you have a collection of old found papers.

(12:06)  
_There you go. Last one:_ _  
_ (12:07)  
_This one actually isn’t exciting. I just wanted an excuse to remind you of naked xylophone man._  
[](https://www.flickr.com/photos/idmakeitbehave/50573833173/in/dateposted-public/)

(12:09)  
Oh, fuck off.

(12:10)  
_Spencer!!!!!!! What the fuck!!!!_

(12:11)  
??

(12:12)  
_Such a potty mouth!!_

(12:13)  
Oh god. Potty mouth?

(12:14)  
_I love it when you cuss._

(12:16)  
Oh, stuff it.

(12:17)  
_There’s my little old man._

*****

 **Wed 23 Dec (5:49pm)** **  
** _….Why is there a package at my desk?_

(6:07)  
Why would I know that?

(6:09)  
_Because it has your name on the card, smartass._ _  
_ (6:10)  
_How do you know where I work?????_

(6:12)  
I have my ways.

(6:13)  
_I’m going to assume your ways goes by the name of one Penelope Garcia._

(6:15)  
Maybe.  
(6:16)  
Did you open it?

(6:21)  
_Oh, Spencer. I don’t know what to say. You just got out of the hospital and your first thought was to get me a present?_ _  
_ (6:22)  
_This is absolutely amazing. You’re so sweet._ _  
_ (6:22)  
_Oh my god and a book signed by DAVID ROSSI?????? Shut the fuck up._

(6:24)  
You can’t be the only one to have fun with the missions :)  
(6:25)  
Merry early Christmas.

(6:28)  
_This might be the best present I’ve ever gotten._

(6:30)  
Wow, if you’re not careful I’m going to get a big head.

(6:31)  
_You mean bigger than you already have?_

(6:33)  
Hey!!

(6:35)  
_:)_

(6:36)  
(:

*****

**Thurs 24 Dec (1:03am)  
** _I don’t know what to say. I love it._  
[ ](https://www.flickr.com/photos/idmakeitbehave/50574706997/in/dateposted-public/)

(1:06)  
Did I finally render the sassy librarian speechless?

(1:08)  
_Yeah._ _  
_ (1:08)  
_I think you did._ _  
_ (1:11)  
_Fuck you, Spencer you made me cry._

(1:13)  
What!! Why? That wasn’t my intention.

(1:15)  
_Good tears, pocket-agent._ _  
_ (1:15)  
_I just. It makes me think of my dad. He would love this._ _  
_ (1:16)  
_“We're both looking at the same moon, in the same world. We're connected to reality by the same line. All I have to do is quietly draw it towards me.”_

(1:18)  
Haruki Murakami.  
(1:19)  
I wanted to give you something to remind you of all of the beautiful things in the world. You always do that for me.

(1:22)  
_God, Spence. How have we only known each other for three months? I don’t think another person has ever gotten me the way you do._ _  
_ (1:23)  
_Thank you._

(1:24)  
You’re very welcome.

*****

 **Fri 25 Dec (9:53am)** **  
** _Merry Christmas, Spence!!!!_

(11:34)  
Merry Christmas, Y/N!!!

(11:49)  
_Give your mom an extra hug for me._

(11:51)  
I will, although it’s a little strange since you don’t know her.

(11:53)  
_She gave the world you, she deserves all the hugs._

(11:54)  
Wow.

(11:56)  
_Good wow?_

(11:57)  
Good wow.

*****

 **Mon 28 Dec (9:47pm)** **  
** _I think I’m going to live in the library._

(10:01)  
You don’t already?

(10:03)  
_I walked directly into that one._ _  
_ (10:03)  
_But I would make an excellent library troll. Could live in the basement and haunt all the students._

(10:05)  
I don’t believe that trolls haunt.

(10:06)  
_Let me have my fun!!!_

(10:07)  
I would never stop you.

(10:08)  
_I knew I liked you for a reason._

(10:10)  
*That’s* the reason?

(10:11)  
_One of many, but that’s the one you’re getting today._

(10:12)  
Many??

(10:13)  
_I will not be elaborating, for fear of giving you that ginormous head._

(10:14)  
Truly tragic.  
(10:14)  
What brought up the library troll aspiration?

(10:15)  
_I’m here and it is *scary* quiet and I love it and I was just thinking…. I could live here._ _  
_ (10:15)  
_Would certainly cut down on my commute._ _  
_ (10:16)  
_Although I don’t know if Edgar would like it._

(10:17)  
There are quite a few instances of library cats, it’s possible.

(10:18)  
_How much do you know about library cats?_

(10:19)  
I can’t tell if you’re really asking me or you’re giving me a hard time.

(10:20)  
_Hey! Fair though…._ _  
_ (10:20)  
_But yes, I am really asking you. Give me an "instance."_

(10:21)  
There’s a library cat in Texas named Browser. A councilman tried to get rid of him, but the cat outlasted the councilman when he lost reelection.

(10:22)  
_Jesus._ _  
_ (10:22)  
_I briefly imagined a library cat losing a reelection._

(10:24)  
You asked!  
(10:24)  
I kind of love the idea of an election to vote for library cats. An incredible advancement for society.

(10:25)  
_And I’m very glad you told me._ _  
_ (10:25)  
_Browser. Wow, what an excellent name. Maybe there’s hope for Edgar yet._

(10:26)  
I may not personally know Edgar, but I’d imagine he could like it.  
(10:26)  
I’d assume he’s much like you.

(10:28)  
_True, we are both brats. And we’re both very cute._

(10:29)  
And so humble.

(10:30)  
_Edgar is *much* more full of himself than I am._

(10:32)  
He sounds like quite the character.

(10:33)  
_You’d love him almost as much as I do._

(10:34)  
I’m sure that I will.

*****

 **Thurs 31 Dec (11:54pm)** **  
** I’m glad I texted you by accident.

(11:55)  
_Are you drunk?_

(11:56)  
Wow, I’m offended that you think I must be drunk to text you that.  
(11:56)  
I just wanted to tell you that you’re one of the best parts of my year.  
(11:57)  
I might be a little drunk.

(12:00am)  
_Happy New Year, pocket-agent._

(12:01)  
Happy New Year, pocket-librarian!!!

(12:03)  
_We’re nauseating._

(12:05)  
Just a little.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh man, we're over the halfway point! Xoxo <3
> 
> OH also I realized I made a playlist for this fic and then never shared it so if anyone’s interested it’s here https://open.spotify.com/playlist/4TogzbPlQfZXuH6zzmf8KN
> 
> Spencer | _Reader_ | **Penelope**

**Tues 5 Jan (11:49pm)** **  
**I saw a floppy disk today and thought of you.

(12:06am)  
 _Oh my god._ _  
_(12:06)  
 _That is the strangest and loveliest thing I’ve ever heard. Truly an honor._

(12:09)  
I’m glad you’re not offended.

(12:10)  
 _I think I’d be a major hypocrite if I was offended by something like that._

(12:11)  
Hm… excellent point.

(12:12)  
 _I’m glad we finally agree on something._

(12:13)  
Wow, rude! And, I think it’s safe to say, false.  
  
(12:14)  
 _Let me live, dude._

(12:15)  
Oh boy.

(12:16)  
 _You’d be lost without my entertaining gobbledygook._

(12:17)  
Every sentence you say just gets more and more absurd.

(12:18)  
 _You’re welcome!!!_ _  
_(12:19)  
 _Alright, I’m done being annoying. How goes it?_

(12:21)  
It goes.

(12:22)  
 _Oh, that good eh?_

(12:23)  
Been better.  
(12:23)  
Also been worse. Much worse.

(12:24)  
 _Jesus, Spencer. Incredibly reassuring._

(12:25)  
It’s just the honest truth.  
(12:25)  
How “goes it” for you?

(12:26)  
 _I love your use of quotation marks just so I can be absolutely certain that you would not dare to speak incorrectly like I do._ _  
_(12:26)  
 _You dork._ _  
_(12:26)  
 _Also it goes fairly well. Just finished the usual late night date with the course reserves and reshelving._

(12:27)  
Just have to cover all of my bases.

(12:28)  
 _You’re so funny._

(12:29)  
Good funny?

(12:30)  
 _Best funny._

(12:32)  
That’s grammatically incorrect.

(12:33)  
 _I TAKE IT BACK._ _  
_(12:33)  
 _You’re bad funny._

(12:34)  
Ugh.

(12:35)  
 _:))))_

*****

 **Fri 8 Jan (10:14pm)** **  
**_Are you working tomorrow?_

(10:23)  
Not yet.

(10:27)  
 _I have another mission for you._

(10:29)  
Another one?!  
  
(10:30)  
 _Should you choose to accept._

(10:31)  
I have to think about it.

(10:32)  
 _Spencer!_ _  
_(10:32)  
 _I thought you trusted me._

(10:34)  
I do. I just wanted to make you squirm.

(10:35)  
 _You are a mean little man._

(10:36)  
I am not little!

(10:37)  
 _I associate you with my phone and my phone is fairly tiny._ _  
_(10:37)  
 _Therefore little._

(10:39)  
Ugh.

(10:40)  
 _Having second thoughts about the mission?_

(10:42)  
I never stopped having first thoughts.

(10:43)  
 _And you call me sassy!!_

(10:46)  
Okay, I can be serious now. What’s the mission?

(10:49)  
 _I’m not going to tell you now._

(10:51)  
Oh, come on.

(10:54)  
 _You’re going to have to wait until tomorrow._

(10:55)  
Pocket-librarian!! That’s just cruel.

(10:56)  
 _You brought this on yourself._ _  
_(10:56)  
 _Sweet dreams, Spencer._

*****

 **Sat 9 Jan (9:23am)** **  
**Tell me!!

(10:03)  
 _Wow, someone’s impatient._

(10:05)  
You can’t just tease me with a mission and then not tell me anything!

(10:06)  
 _Oh yes I can._

(10:15)  
….

(10:17)  
 _Sorry, just had to let you sweat a little._ _  
  
_(10:19)  
Ugh. You’re impossible.

(10:25)  
 _38°53′22″N 77°0′11″W_

(10:26)  
Again with the coordinates?

(10:27)  
 _I am nothing if not consistent._ _  
_(10:27)  
 _Can you make it there by 3pm?_

(10:31)  
There’s a time limit now?

(10:33)  
 _It’ll be worth it, I promise._

(10:35)  
Yes, I can make it.

(10:38)  
 _Godspeed._

(10:39)  
You’re so strange.

(10:40)  
 _;)_

~

(3:01pm)  
Wow.

(3:03)  
 _Haven’t been there before?_

(3:05)  
No. I guess I just never made the time.  
(3:13)  
Oh my god. Y/N, the manuscripts!!!!

(3:15)  
 _I think I’ve been successful. I reduced you to “oh my god” and overusing exclamation points._

(3:17)  
I don’t understand why I had to get here by 3.

(3:18)  
 _So you were ready for the rest at 3:30._

(3:20)  
The rest?

(3:21)  
 _Head to the theater._

(3:23)  
What?  
(3:29)  
Oh.

(3:30)  
 _Enjoy.  
  
~ _

(4:33)  
Wow. I don’t know what to say.

(4:37)  
 _Did you like it?_

(4:39)  
I loved it. I think I could listen to that for the rest of my life.

(4:41)  
 _Oh man, high praise. I may have outdone myself._  
(4:41)  
 _They have all kinds of concerts and readings there, it’s amazing._

(4:45)  
I can’t believe I’ve never been here before.

(4:49)  
 _Hard to make time for fine art when you’re busy being a superhero._

(4:51)  
Oh, stop.

(4:54)  
 _I will not._

(4:55)  
Good.

*****

 **Wed 13 Jan (7:47pm)** **  
**_I have a question._

(8:29)  
Since when have you ever not just asked?

(8:34)  
 _Shhhh._

(8:40)  
I'm waiting, pocket-librarian.

(8:43)  
 _How would you feel about…._ _  
_(8:43)  
 _Meeting? Like in real life. We’ve “known” each other for more than three months now._

(8:46)  
Oh.  
(8:46)  
Oh, wow.

(8:47)  
 _You’re right, it was a stupid idea._

(8:48)  
Y/N.

(8:49)  
 _Spencer._

(8:51)  
It’s not a stupid idea.  
(8:51)  
It’s just- it’s kind of intimidating.

(8:54)  
 _Are you scared of me?_

(8:55)  
Not you. I guess it’s just easier for me to hide behind my phone.  
(8:55)  
That sounds lame. I’m sorry. I’m just not the best with… well, with people.

(8:56)  
 _I’m people and I promise I am probably just as awkward as you._ _  
_(8:57)  
 _I’m a librarian, for fuck’s sake._

(9:00)  
Very good point.

(9:01)  
 _There’s my sassy little friend._

(9:02)  
I’m not little!  
(9:03)  
Okay...what did you have in mind?

(9:05)  
 _What are you doing Saturday?_

(9:06)  
I have a feeling you’re going to tell me.

(9:07)  
 _Remember that coffee shop from your first mission?_

(9:08)  
I remember everything.

(9:09)  
 _Touche._ _  
_(9:09)  
 _4pm? Coffee?_ _  
_(9:10)  
 _No pressure, no expectations. What do you think?_

(9:17)  
Okay.

(9:18)  
 _You sure?_

(9:19)  
Yeah.

(9:20)  
 _Okay._

*****

 **Sat 16 Jan (1:02pm)** **  
**_We still on for today?_

(1:46)  
Yes.

(1:59)  
 _Cool. I’ll be the one with the purple galaxy sweatshirt. Just so you don’t miss me._

(2:09)  
Sounds perfect.

~

(3:44)  
I am so sorry to do this, but something came up at work and I’m not going to be able to make it.  
(3:45)  
I am really really sorry, Y/N.

(3:47)  
 _Oh. That’s alright. Duty calls!_ _  
_(3:47)  
 _Another time?_

(3:49)  
Definitely.

*****

 **Sat 16 Jan (4:02pm)** **  
**Penelope, I fucked up.  
(4:02)  
I fucked up really badly.

(4:03)  
 **Spencer? What’s wrong??? Do I need to call someone?????**

(4:04)  
No, no. I’m okay. Well, not okay. But physically, I’m fine.  
(4:04)  
It’s just- I saw her.

(4:05)  
 **Who?! ELABORATE genius!!!**

(4:07)  
Y/N.

(4:09)  
 **What!! How? What happened?? Do I need to hurt someone????**

(4:11)  
I’m frightened that your mind immediately goes there.

(4:12)  
 **Well, you’re freaking me out Boy Wonder!!! I’ve heard you swear like three times in all of the years I’ve known you. Spill!**

(4:13)  
We were going to meet today. And I went to the coffee shop and I saw her.  
(4:13)  
And I couldn’t do it. I left.  
(4:14)  
I lied to her, Pen. I lied. I am a horrible person.

(4:15)  
 **Angel, you are not a horrible person. You are one of the best people I know. Why did you leave?**

(4:17)  
What if she meets me and she hates me? What if I scare her away and she never talks to me again? What if I’m not at all like she imagined and I ruin everything?  
(4:17)  
I don’t know what I would do if that happened. I can’t do it.

(4:18)  
 **That would never happen. You are absolutely incredible, Spencer. You are kind and brilliant and funny and anyone would be lucky to know you. And if she doesn’t see it, that is on *her*** **  
**(4:19)  
 **But I’ve heard the way she talks about you, just from what you told me. She sees it. I can tell that she does.** **  
**(4:19)  
 **Honey, that big old brain of yours is lying to you.**

(4:20)  
I don’t know what to do.  
(4:20)  
I saw her. And I knew I never wanted to walk away from her.

(4:21)  
 **Maybe you don’t have to walk away from her.**

(4:23)  
That’s what scares me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry :)
> 
> Also, location of the mission is Folger Shakespeare Library


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ((I did tag 'Spencer's an idiot and Penelope's the best best friend' for a reason.....)) ;)
> 
> Spencer | _Reader_ | **Penelope** | Derek

**Thurs 21 Jan (2:54am)**   
_Pocket-agent!!!_

(2:56)  
Everything okay?  
(2:56)  
What are you doing awake?

(2:57)  
 _I’ve just missed you, stranger. What’s up?_

(2:58)  
Another long day blurring into the next.

(2:59)  
 _:( what’s wrong?_

(3:01)  
Oh, nothing.

(3:02)  
 _Spencer._

(3:03)  
Y/N.

(3:04)  
 _You can talk to me. You don’t need to hurt all by yourself._

(3:06)  
It’s just…  
(3:06)  
Sometimes I forget why I do this.

(3:07)  
 _Rough case?_

(3:08)  
Yeah.

(3:09)  
 _It’s because you’re brilliant and amazing and you’re making a difference for a lot of people. And you have an enormous heart._

(3:11)  
Idiopathic dilated cardiomyopathy is not something to be taken lightly.  
(3:11)  
And once again you think too highly of me.

(3:12)  
 _I think it’s time for you to get some sleep, Spence. Sleep and things might seem a little better in the morning. And then we can deal with whatever else._

(3:14)  
I want to, but I can’t.

(3:15)  
 _Can’t deal?_

(3:16)  
No, can’t sleep.

(3:17)  
 _Is this a common occurrence?_

(3:18)  
...unfortunately.

(3:20) **  
****_~Incoming call~_ ** **_  
_** “Uh, hello?”

_“Hey, Spence.”_

“Hi, Y/N.”

_“Are you in bed?”_

“What-”

_“Get in bed.”_

“You’re so bossy.”

_“It’s part of my charm. Alright, I hear rustling. You good?”_

“Yes, boss. I’m in bed.”

_“Oh Agent, I love it when you call me boss.”_

“I think you’re the one who needs to go to bed.”

_“Sh.”_

“What are you doing?”

_“Grabbing something. Put your phone on speaker and settle in.”_

“Uh-”

_“Trust me.”_

“Fine.”

_“It was many and many a year ago-”_

“Oh... _Oh_.”

_“Sh. It was many and many a year ago, in a kingdom by the sea, that a maiden there lived whom you may know by the name of Annabel Lee; and this maiden she lived with no other thought than to love and be loved by me…”_

~

(4:06)  
 _“You still there?”_

“...”

_“...Goodnight, Spencer. Sweet dreams.”_

*****

 **Sat 23 Jan (10:32pm)** **  
**You’re too good for me.

(10:34)  
 _What?_ _  
_(10:34)  
 _I want to make a witty remark, but it’s difficult to discern your tone over text._

(10:37)  
I don’t deserve to know someone as good as you.

(10:37)  
 _Spencer? What’s going on? You’re kind of scaring me._

(10:38)  
And you deserve someone better than me. Someone real. Someone good.

(10:39)  
 _Spencer. I am an entire person. I think I can make that decision for myself. And I decide that I deserve to know you. And you are very much real and good._ _  
_(10:39)  
 _What is this?? What’s happening?_ _  
_(10:40)  
 _Is this some strange convoluted way of trying to get rid of me? Are you trying to reverse-psychology me?_

(10:41)  
No. I don’t ever want to “get rid” of you.  
(10:41)  
But maybe you should get rid of me.

(10:42)  
 _Please. Don’t do this._ _  
_(10:42)  
 _I don’t know what’s going on, but I am not getting rid of you. You are my friend._

(10:44)  
I lied to you.

(10:44)  
 _What?_

(10:45)  
I went to the coffee shop.

(10:46)  
 _….what? What the fuck?_ _  
_(10:46)  
 _What happened?_

(10:47)  
I saw you. And I got scared.  
(10:47)  
I ran. I ran like a coward.

(10:48)  
 _Oh._ _  
_(10:48)  
 _I-_ _  
_(10:51)  
 _You could have just told me. But it’s okay. I know you were hesitant about meeting to begin with._

(10:52)  
I lied to you.

(10:53)  
 _I heard that the first time. It’s- well it’s not okay necessarily, but it’s alright. I get why you did it._

(10:54)  
Stop.

(10:55)  
 _What? What do you mean?_

(10:56)  
Stop being so understanding.

(10:57)  
 _Spencer, please. It’s okay that you didn’t want to meet me. I pushed you and maybe it was just too soon._ _  
_(10:58)  
 _Or maybe you just don’t want to meet me. And I guess that I have to be okay with that._

(11:00)  
Stop.  
(11:00)  
Why aren’t you mad at me? You should be angry.

(11:02)  
 _Spencer. I’m trying not to be angry. I want to be understanding. I *do* understand. At least, as much as I really can._ _  
_(11:02)  
 _Do you want me to be angry?_

(11:03)  
I don’t know. You should be.

(11:08)  
 _I’m not. I won’t lie, it hurts that you didn’t want to see me. And I could definitely take it personally, but I’m trying really hard not to._ _  
_(11:09)  
 _And I’m upset that you lied, but I get it. Or I’m trying to. I wish you had just told me you didn’t want to meet instead of standing me up and straight up lying to me, but I get it._  
(11:09)  
 _I know I can be *charming*, but I can also be kind of pushy sometimes._ _  
_(11:10)  
 _I know you were nervous and I pushed you and that wasn’t cool. You probably felt pressured to say yes to me._

(11:13)  
You don’t know that.  
(11:13)  
You don’t really know me. And you don’t really like me. Maybe you like the idea of me, but it’s not real. *This* isn't real. It’s just something we’ve made up.

(11:14)  
 _Spencer._ _  
_(11:14)  
 _Please don’t do this. It’s not something we’ve made up. It’s real. At least it’s real to me._

(11:15)  
We’re two complete strangers.

(11:16)  
 _...okay now I’m angry. You’re telling me this was all nothing? Because it sure as hell doesn’t *feel* like nothing._ _  
_(11:16)  
 _It sure as hell doesn’t fucking hurt like it was nothing._ _  
_(11:17)  
 _You’re being an ass._ _  
_(11:17)  
 _Are you trying to push me away?_

(11:18)  
No.  
(11:18)  
I-  
(11:18)  
I don’t know what I’m doing.

(11:19)  
 _I’m gonna let you think on that._ _  
_(11:20)  
 _Let me know when you’re done being an ass._

*****

 **Sun 24 Jan (11:33am)** **  
**_Penelope? It’s Y/N. Can you just make sure Spencer’s alright? I’m not sure what’s going on._

(11:37)  
 **Oh, honey. Of course.**

(11:39)  
 _Thank you._

*****

 **Mon 25 Jan (6:58pm)** **  
**I’m sorry.

*****

 **Fri 29 Jan (7:39pm)** **  
**I miss you.

(11:17)  
 _I miss you too._

*****

 **Sat 30 Jan (7:01am)** **  
**I don’t know what to do.

(9:10)  
 **Ugh, why must you be up so early on our day off???** **  
**(9:11)  
 **What’s going on?**

(9:20)  
I ruined everything.  
(9:20)  
The best thing in my life and I ruined it. I ruined it so completely and for no good reason and now I don’t know what to do.

(9:21)  
 **Spencer, we talked about this. You did not ruin everything.** **  
**(9:21)  
 **Have you still not talked to her?!**

(9:23)  
....

(9:23)  
 **I thought you were supposed to be a genius!!!!!!!!**

(9:24)  
You sound like Y/N.

(9:25)  
 **You stupid lovesick puppy.** **  
**(9:25)  
 **Apologize to her!! Talk to her!!! That is all it takes.**

(9:30)  
I don’t know why I did it.

(9:31)  
 **I do.**

(9:32)  
Are you a profiler suddenly?

(9:34)  
 **Wow, you really can be an ass.** **  
**(9:34)  
 **Honey, you’re just scared. You tried to sabotage this…. friendship? relationship? crush?? or whatever because you’re afraid of what could happen.** **  
**(9:35)  
 **You’re afraid something is going to go wrong. But you need to let it go. Just let whatever is going to happen happen.** **  
**(9:36)  
 **She likes you, you big dumb idiot. For who you are. No matter what you look like or how much you go off on tangents about absurd statistics or your ridiculously poor posture.**

(9:41)  
...I hate it when you’re right.

(9:41)  
 **Boy Wonder, I am *always* right.**

(9:42)  
Ugh.

(9:43)  
 **Talk. To. Her. APOLOGIZE. Grovel if you must.** **  
**(9:43)  
 **If you think she’s worth the groveling…**

(9:44)  
She’s worth everything.  
(9:45)  
FUCK why did I do this???

(9:46)  
 **Oh man, I really hate to see you like this, love. <333 it’ll all work out. Just talk, okay?? A real, honest apology. It’ll work wonders.**

(9:47)  
I hope so.  
(9:47)  
I don’t know what I’ll do if it doesn’t.

*****

 **Sat 30 Jan (10:07am)** **  
****Chocolate Thunder we have a problem!!!**

(10:09)  
You okay?? Need me to come over?? 

(10:10)  
 **No, but I do love how quick you are to offer ;)** **  
**(10:10)  
 **It’s the lovenerds!!**

(10:11)  
...do I want to know? 

(10:12)  
 **My new code name for Spencer & Y/N.**

(10:13)  
Don’t quit your day job, mama. 

(10:13)  
 **I’m gonna smack you the next time I see you. It’s gonna hurt.**

(10:14)  
That better be a promise. 

(10:15)  
 **FOCUS!! Our resident genius is struggling.**

(10:16)  
No meddling! Reid is a big boy, he can figure this one out. 

(10:17)  
 **He’s so smart but so so stupid!!!!**

(10:18)  
I know, baby girl. But he’ll figure it out. He always does. 

(10:19)  
 **You better be right or you’re getting a smackdown.** **  
**(10:19)  
 **And NOT of the fun variety.**


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love all of you yelling at Spencer in the last chapter, your comments give me life!! Hope this makes it better. Xoxo <3
> 
> Spencer | _Reader_

**Sun 31 Jan (9:23pm)** **  
**I’m sorry. You were right and I was completely out of line.  
(9:23)  
I got scared and I ran and then I tried to push you away and that’s not fair.  
(9:25)  
When I saw you that day, I knew you were someone I didn’t ever want to walk away from. And that scared the hell out of me. It felt like there was this idea of me in your head that I could never possibly live up to. I was afraid I would disappoint you. And I was worried that you would hate me or I would do something stupid and you would realize that you never wanted to see me again and I was an ass. I didn’t know what I would do if you never wanted to talk to me again. But then I went and ruined it anyway.  
(9:25)  
I’m sorry. I didn’t mean what I said.  
(9:26)  
About this not being real.  
(9:26)  
And I’m sorry it took me so long to say this.  
(9:26)  
And for being an ass.  
(9:27)  
You deserve better than that. You deserve everything good.

(10:01)  
 _Oh, Spence. I am so, so glad to hear from you. Thank you for explaining. I forgive you._ _  
_(10:02)  
 _And I get it. I swear I do. It’s scary, this whole thing. It’s weird and strange and something I’m sure neither of us ever expected. But I have the same worries as you. I was worried you’d meet me and be disappointed and I built it all up in my head. So it really hurt when you pulled that shit. But I do get it. And I do forgive you._ _  
_(10:02)  
 _I know a self-sabotage when I see one._

(10:07)  
What?

(10:09)  
 _Contrary to this imaginary pedestal you’ve seemed to put me on, I’m human too. I’ve got my own baggage and ridiculous defense mechanisms._ _  
_(10:10)  
 _I didn’t spend years in therapy after my dad for nothing._

(10:13)  
God, Y/N. I’m so sorry. I’ve messed everything up. I’ve been so selfish and idiotic.

(10:14)  
 _You haven’t. I promise._ _  
_(10:15)  
 _But please, please don’t do that again. Just…_ _  
_(10:15)  
 _I don’t know, just tell me how you feel. If you don’t want to meet me or you don’t want to keep talking to me or whatever. It might hurt, but it hurts more when you don’t tell the truth. It was just… really confusing. It really… it made me think you hated me or that I did something wrong. And it shouldn’t have to feel like that._ _  
_(10:16)  
 _I know this is just some weird little texting thing and I don’t want it to feel like an obligation. So if you want out just tell me.  
_  
(10:17)  
The last thing I wanted to do was hurt you. I’m so incredibly sorry. You didn’t deserve that. And this is more than some “weird little texting thing.” You’re my friend. You really, really are.  
(10:17)  
And I absolutely do not “want out.”  
(10:18)  
I let my mind get the better of me and I didn’t handle it in a mature way. I just- I got scared. I know that’s no excuse. It’s just the truth.  
(10:18)  
I’m so sorry I ruined everything. I wish I had something better to say, something that would fix this. This doesn’t feel like enough.  
  
(10:20)  
 _Spence, you didn’t ruin anything. And it is enough. Sure, you made stuff a little confusing and painful for a few days, but it’s okay. I promise. Life isn’t always sunshine and rainbows._ _  
_(10:20)  
 _But it can be a lot of the time. I swear. You make me remember the good things- you *are* a good thing._ _  
_(10:21)  
 _I think that we’re a good thing. If you’ll let us be._

(10:24)  
I would understand if you need some time before you can be friends again. Or if you want to walk away.  
(10:24)  
I was a jerk and I get it.

(10:25)  
 _Yeah, you were a jerk. But I get where you were coming from, Spence. It’s okay to be scared. But it’s also okay to talk about it. I’m not going to leave just because you messed up. We’re human, we all mess up sometimes and we all need forgiveness sometimes._ _  
_(10:25)  
 _I don’t ever want to walk away from you._ _  
_(10:26)  
 _And you were a little bit right last week, I don’t *fully* know you._ _  
_(10:26)  
 _But I’d like to. If you’d let me._

(10:28)  
I’d like that a lot.

(10:29)  
 _I like you a lot._ _  
_(10:29)  
 _No matter what your brain might be telling you.  
  
_ *****

 **Wed 3 Feb (4:57pm)** **  
**Did you know that the Welsh call February “y mis bach”? It means “little month”

(5:48)  
 _Who is this?_

(5:50)  
...

(5:51)  
 _Sorry, sorry! That was the petty side of me, I had to let her out for a second._ _  
_(5:52)  
 _We’re all set. Hello, Spencer._

(5:55)  
I deserved that.

(5:56)  
 _No, no!! I promise I’m not mad. Everything is okay._ _  
_(5:56)  
 _Just gotta get my kicks somewhere._

(5:59)  
You’re impossible.

(6:01)  
 _And yet you’re still here._

(6:03)  
Well, you’re obsessed with me. Couldn’t abandon you now.

(6:05)  
 _Hey, that was more than two months ago! Let. it. Go._

(6:07)  
I. can. not.

(6:08)  
 _Snarky little man._

(6:11)  
I am not little!

(6:13)  
 _Well, I wouldn’t know, now would I?_ _  
_(6:14)  
 _Okay, okay. I’m done. Sorry for pushing your buttons._

(6:17)  
I would expect nothing less from you, to be honest.

(6:19)  
 _How are things, Spence? For real._

(6:21)  
They’re...better. I’ve missed talking to you.

(6:23)  
 _I’ve missed talking to you too._ _  
_(6:23)  
 _Can I give you some advice that might be completely out of line? And feel free to tell me to fuck off._

(6:26)  
I won’t do that, but sure.

(6:27)  
 _You are far too trusting._  
(6:28)  
 _I just… Can I suggest talking to someone? Like a legitimate professional?_ _  
_(6:28)  
 _Tell me if I’m out of line. It’s just, it really helped after my dad. And it still helps. I’m a firm believer that everyone could benefit from therapy. Sometimes you just need another perspective._ _  
_(6:30)  
 _And this has nothing to do with you standing me up, I swear. I just know that you’ve been through a lot and like I said, it hurts to keep it all in. And it’s hard to deal with that kind of stuff on your own. And I know how we can be our own worst enemy._ _  
_(6:31)  
 _Okay, unwarranted advice dump over now. Feel free to tell me to get lost._

(6:36)  
You sound like Penelope.

(6:38)  
 _...is that a bad thing? I’m really sorry if I overstepped._

(6:41)  
Not at all. I have the feeling that the two of you are always right.  
(6:42)  
I have been thinking about it. It just feels like a hard step.

(6:44)  
 _The merit of all things lies in their difficulty._

(6:46)  
Alexandre Dumas.  
(6:46)  
I love your internal quote catalogue.

(6:47)  
 _One of the few perks of being friends with a librarian._

(6:49)  
There are an abundance of perks to being friends with you.

(6:51)  
 _:)  
  
_ (6:53)  
Thank you for not giving up on me.

(6:54)  
 _Wild horses, Spencer. Wild horses.  
  
_ *****

 **Sun 7 Feb (11:39pm)** **  
**_Please tell me there is a scientific reason that students decide that getting drunk and going to the fucking *library* sounds like a good use of their Sunday night??_

(11:58)  
This doesn’t sound rhetorical.

(12:01am)  
 _It’s not!!!! Who the fuck decides to go to the stacks and party??_

(12:03)  
What happened?

(12:05)  
 _Exactly what it sounds like. Jesus christ I do not get paid enough for this._  
(12:06)  
 _They like built a barricade with the science section??_ _  
_(12:06)  
 _Don’t get me wrong, the coding textbooks are *not* my favorite, but they do not deserve this._

(12:09)  
I had no idea the library could get so crazy.

(12:12)  
 _Oh shut it, Mister “I was 13 in college.” You wouldn’t know a college party if it smacked you in the face!_

(12:15)  
Someone’s feeling hostile.

(12:16)  
 _Ugh, I’m sorry. It’s the puke. I’m not normally like this._

(12:19)  
….puke?

(12:21)  
 _Yes, Spencer. Someone fucking threw up in the stacks._ _  
_(12:22)  
 _Jesus christ. I need a drink. Or sedation._

(12:25)  
Wow, I don’t even know what to say.

(12:27)  
 _Tell that to the QRs!!_ _  
_(12:27)  
 _May they rest in relative peace._

(12:29)  
Christ.

(12:31)  
 _Have I finally pushed you over the edge?_

(12:33)  
I’m just-  
(12:34)  
Picturing this absolute disaster.

(12:35)  
 _Add that to the catalog next to naked xylophone man._

(12:38)  
Oh, come on!

(12:40)  
 _I gotta change the subject somehow. I’m walking home and desperately trying to get the smell of puke out of my nose._

(12:44)  
You should pay attention while walking outside.

(12:47)  
 _I’ll be fine, Agent._ _  
_(12:48)  
 _If I get abducted, you know it was NXM._

(12:51)  
NXM?

(12:53)  
 _Naked xylophone man, obviously._

(12:55)  
Oh, shut up.

(12:57)  
 _Wow, Spencer! I love it when you tell me to shut up._

(12:59)  
>:(

(1:01)  
 _:)_

(1:02)  
I really missed you.

(1:03)  
 _Still?? It’s been like a week! You’ll get sick of me yet._   
(1:03)  
 _[I really missed you too.]_


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have nothing exciting to say, but I hope y'all enjoy!! Thanks for the love <3
> 
> Spencer | _Reader_ | **Penelope** | Derek

**Wed 10 Feb (9:12pm)** **  
**_You wanna hear a joke?_

(9:15)  
I don’t know if I should answer this.

(9:18)  
 _I thought you trusted me!!!_

(9:19)  
You’re going to say something rude.

(9:20)  
 _Hey!_

(9:21)  
Tell me you weren’t thinking it.

(9:22)  
 _...Fine._ _  
_(9:22)  
 _[the joke is your face]_

(9:24)  
That’s an astronomically terrible joke, especially given that you have never seen my face.

(9:25)  
 _Your face is an astronomically terrible joke!!!_ _  
_(9:25)  
 _Also that’s harsh man, way to just rub salt in the wound._

(9:27)  
...I walked right into that one, didn’t I.

(9:28)  
 _Yes you did. HA._

(9:30)  
I suppose I deserve it.

(9:31)  
 _Why do you have to do that!!_

(9:32)  
Do what?

(9:34)  
 _Make me regret being mean to you!  
_ (9:34)  
 _You deserve nice things. I promise._ _  
_(9:35)  
 _But you do also deserve to get made fun of. Just a little._

(9:37)  
You are absolutely something else.

(9:38)  
 _I’m going to pretend that you mean that in a positive way._

(9:39)  
I do.

(9:41)  
 _Also, I don’t think your face is an astronomically terrible joke. I think you’re adorable._

(9:43)  
You can’t possibly know that.

(9:45)  
 _As someone fairly smart once said, I don’t need to know what you look like to know that you’re adorable._

(9:47)  
Only fairly smart?

(9:48)  
 _Yep._ _  
_(9:49)  
 _Can’t be *too* nice to you or that big head might just POP._

(9:51)  
Jesus.

(9:52)  
 _No, my name’s Y/N._

(9:54)  
You need to lay off the caffeine.

(9:55)  
 _NEVER!!!!_ _  
_(9:56)  
 _I may be ridiculous and annoying, but at least I make you laugh, right?_

(9:59)  
That you do.  
(10:00)  
And I still don’t find you annoying.  
(10:00)  
Definitely ridiculous. But incredibly endearing.

(10:02)  
 _Now MY big head may just pop._

(10:03)  
I really hope not.

(10:04)  
 _I’ll de-inflate._ _  
_(10:04)  
 _Just for you :)_

(10:05)  
I’m never going to hear that original joke, am I?

(10:06)  
 _You’re making the pretty bold assumption that that wasn’t my intended joke all along._

(10:07)  
I would say that there’s no way for you to have predicted what I said, but you somehow always seem to surprise me.

(10:08)  
 _If I’m good for one thing, it’s astronomically terrible jokes._

(10:10)  
I suppose that would be your one thing.

(10:11)  
 _Whoa!!!! Coming in hot, Spence._

(10:12)  
...I’m not quite sure what that means.

(10:13)  
 _Just saying you’re feeling quite saucy with the comebacks tonight._

(10:14)  
What can I say? You’ve inspired me.

(10:15)  
 _My one good impact on the world._

(10:16)  
Now that’s just a boldfaced lie.  
(10:16)  
You have impacted this world in infinitely wonderful ways.

(10:17)  
 _God, Spence._

(10:19)  
What?

(10:20)  
 _You’re just such a lovely, lovely person._ _  
_(10:20)  
 _And don’t even try to argue with me._

(10:21)  
Fine.  
(10:21)  
Only because you insist, pocket-librarian.  
  
*****

 **Sun 14 Feb (10:48am)** **  
**Pen, why is there a package at my door?

(11:12)  
 **I don’t know, it’s not from me!**

(11:15)  
...I know that.  
(11:18)  
You told her where I live?

(11:19)  
 **Wow! You think so little of me, Boy Wonder??? I don’t accept that.** **  
**(11:19)  
 **Just call me Cupid the in-between messenger ;)**

(11:23)  
You frighten me.

(11:24)  
 **We’ve been over this. You love me. I love you.** **  
**(11:24)  
 **Although it looks like I may have some competition…**

(11:27)  
What do you mean?

(11:28)  
 **You cannot be that dense.**

(11:31)  
The human body has a density of roughly 0.985 gm/cm³.  
(11:32)  
Not sure what that has to do with anything, though.

(11:35)  
 **Fucking hell.** **  
**(11:35)  
 **Spencer. What is today?**

(11:37)  
February 14th.  
(11:37)  
Valentine’s Day. I know that, I’m not stupid.

(11:39)  
 **Okay, so prove it!!!** **  
**(11:40)  
 **Do people normally get their friends gifts for Valentine’s Day?** **  
**(11:40)  
 **Aside from me of course, because I am just full of so much love and I need to give it to all of you.**

(11:43)  
...no. Typically Valentine’s gifts amongst friends are reserved for the younger population, mostly elementary age children.

(11:45)  
 **Alright, and Y/N got you a gift for Valentine’s Day so that means….**

(11:48)  
She didn’t grow out of the elementary school phase?

(11:49)  
 **I am going to come to your apartment and SMACK YOU.**

(11:51)  
Garcia!!!!

(11:52)  
 **She likes you, you MORON.** **  
**(11:52)  
 **Like… romantically likes you. Like kissy face likes you!!!**

(11:56)  
What? That’s absurd.  
(11:57)  
She’s never even seen me.

(11:58)  
 **So??? Does that stop you from liking her?**

(12:03pm)  
I… no.  
(12:04)  
I don’t understand.

(12:05)  
 **You’re impossible. There’s a lot to love about you, genius. She likes you. Embrace it. Go with it.** **  
**(12:05)  
 **Doctor of Love at your service ;)))) I’m gonna start charging by the hour soon.**

(12:06)  
See you tomorrow, Penelope.

(12:07)  
 **You can run but you can’t hide!!!**

*****

 **Sun 14 Feb (1:23pm)** **  
**Thank you for the journal, it was very thoughtful. You have excellent taste.  
(1:24)  
I was momentarily worried that I had a stalker though, to be completely honest.

(1:37)  
 _Whoa, so you can use Garcia to find out where I work but it doesn’t go both ways??_ _  
_(1:37)  
 _Hypocrite._

(1:41)  
The thought of you two working together frightens me.

(1:44)  
 _Watch your back, pocket-agent. I might leave you for her._ _  
_(1:53)  
 _I was joking._

(1:56)  
I know that!

(1:57)  
 _Alrighty, just checking. I know I have a tendency to overjoke via text._

(2:01)  
No, I think it’s just right.

(2:03)  
 _I don’t think I will ever get used to you complimenting me._

(2:05)  
Good, it doesn’t last long.

(2:06)  
 _Ah, there’s my snarky Spencer!_ _  
_(2:06)  
 _I feel like in real life you’re as threatening as a teddy bear._

(2:08)  
Hey!

(2:09)  
 _That might be an insult to teddy bears though._

*****

 **Wed 17 Feb (8:12pm)** **  
** How long has this been going on? 

(8:15)  
 **Me and you? Since the beginning of the universe, baby.**

(8:16)  
Reid and that librarian!! Smartass.   
(8:16)  
I know all about me and you ;) 

(8:17)  
 **Good answer, Chocolate Thunder.** **  
**(8:17)  
 **To answer your actual question, it’s been almost five months. Why???**

(8:20)  
Just wondering. It’s getting a little sad to watch the whole “will they or won’t they” shit. 

(8:21)  
 **Do I smell an intervention?!!**

(8:23)  
No!!   
(8:23)  
No meddling!!! I stand by that. 

(8:25)  
 **I will crack you yet.**

(8:27)  
I’d love to see you try. 

(8:28)  
 **Oh you will. Don’t you worry, hot stuff.**

*****

 **Fri 19 Feb (10:27pm)** **  
**_Look what I found_.  
(10:27)  
[](https://www.flickr.com/photos/idmakeitbehave/50626389473/in/dateposted-public/)

(10:36)  
That would be fairly frightening if they weren’t declassified.

(10:38)  
 _Wow, are you afraid of me??_ _  
_(10:39)  
 _I just thought it was neat!_

(10:41)  
I’m joking.

(10:42)  
 _Wow, you’re the one having to explain that to me?_ _  
_(10:42)  
 _How the tables have turned._

(10:45)  
What are you doing with old government reports at work?

(10:48)  
 _Oh you know, just hanging out. Chilling._

(10:50)  
...

(10:51)  
 _I’m going to pretend you couldn’t respond because you were too busy laughing at how absolutely hysterical I am._ _  
_(10:52)  
 _Anyway, I’m not doing anything with them. I’m in the basement getting ready for some renovations and I found them in the back. I love exploring the basement, it’s creepy as shit._

(10:55)  
Some of that Halloween love coming through, I see.

(10:56)  
 _Hell yeah. Give me all the creepy things._ _  
_(10:56)  
 _Except for like… actual serial killers._

(11:00)  
Yeah, they’re less creepy and more… highly disturbed.

(11:02)  
 _I don’t know how you do it._ _  
_(11:03)  
 _Only 255 days until Halloween!!_

(11:05)  
Wow, I thought only I knew that.

(11:07)  
 _You might be the only genius here, but you are not the only Halloween aficionado._ _  
_(11:08)  
 _Almost time to start planning the next costume._

(11:11)  
You’re incredible.

(11:13)  
 _That’s a strange way to spell “weird.”_

(11:15)  
Sh.

(11:16)  
 _You sh!_

(11:18)  
Ridiculous.

(11:19)  
 _That’s more like it._


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *insert maniacal cackle here* <33
> 
> Spencer | _Reader_ | **Penelope** | Derek

**Tues 23 Feb (10:49pm)** **  
** _ I saw a book today and it made me think of you. _

(11:21)   
Oh? Do share.

(11:23)   
_ ;) _ _   
_ (11:23)  
[](https://www.flickr.com/photos/idmakeitbehave/50643145091/in/dateposted-public/)  
  
(11:26)   
Wow. That’s low, Y/N.   
(11:26)   
Are you insinuating that I’m a toddler or an asshole?

(11:28)   
_ Why not both? _ _   
_ (11:28)   
_ I’d like to imagine you look like that child on the cover, snot and all. _

(11:31)   
Ugh. That’s disgusting. Don’t make me look at that.

(11:33)   
_ Not a fan of boogers? _

(11:34)   
Shut up.   
(11:34)   
Yuck.

(11:35)   
_ I see I’ve touched a nerve. You must get nauseous around kids, they’re just little cesspools. _

(11:37)   
I love kids actually.   
(11:37)   
The germ aspect though...took a while to get over.

(11:41)   
_ Yeah, when I was a preschool teacher it took me a while to get over the yuck-factor. _

(11:43)   
You were a preschool teacher??

(11:45)   
_ Yep, during undergrad and a little bit after. I loved it. _

(11:47)   
Why didn’t I know this?

(11:49)   
_ Contrary to popular belief, you don’t know everything about me. _

(11:51)   
You continue to be full of surprises.   
(11:52)   
Who’s worse- preschoolers or college students?

(11:54)   
_ Oh, college students hands down. _ _   
_ (11:54)   
_ Preschoolers have the nifty excuse of not having a fully developed brain. College students are much closer. _ _   
_ (11:55)   
_ I can excuse behavior under that guise if you’re 4. Not so much if you’re 21. _

(11:57)   
Excellent point.   
(11:58)   
Wow.

(12:00am)   
_ Wow what? _

(12:02)   
You’re just amazing.

(12:05)   
_ Oh stuff it. _

(12:07)   
You’re starting to sound like me.

(12:09)   
_ Yeah, that’s called transference. Like when people start to look like their dogs. _ _   
_ (12:10)   
_ I guess that’s what happens when you spend five months texting someone. _

(12:12)   
Wow, five months.

(12:13)   
_ Yeah. _ _   
_ (12:13)   
_ It’s crazy.  
  
_ *****  
  
**Fri 26 Feb (6:02pm)** **  
** What are you up to this weekend?

(6:47)   
_ I uh… I got asked on a date for tomorrow. _ _   
_ (6:48)   
_ By someone from work. _

(6:54)   
Oh.   
(6:55)   
Are you going to go?  
  
(6:56)   
_ Oh. _   
(6:57)   
_ I- I don’t know. _ _   
_ (6:57)   
_ Should I go? _

(7:00)   
Why are you asking me?

(7:01)   
_ I don’t know. _ _   
_ (7:01)   
_ Because I care what you think? _

(7:04)   
It’s your decision. If you want to, you should go for it.

(7:06)   
_ Oh. _ _   
_ (7:06)   
_ Okay.  
  
_ *****

**Sat 27 Feb (11:26am)** **  
** **Do I need to come over and slap some sense into you???**

(11:37)   
You threaten a lot of violence for someone who would never hurt a fly.

(11:39)   
**Well, a fly isn’t as hopelessly stupid as you are!**

(11:41)   
Care to explain why you’re insulting me this time?

(11:43)   
**UGH!!!!** **  
** (11:44)   
**She asked you because she wanted you to say no!!**

(11:47)   
No way.   
(11:48)   
That doesn’t make any sense. Why wouldn’t she just say no to the person?

(11:49)   
**My hourly rate just increased.**   
(11:49)   
**You’re going to make my beautiful golden locks go prematurely gray.**

(11:51)   
I’m so confused.

(11:52)   
**Spencer. Do you *want* her to be going on this date?**

(11:54)   
...of course I don’t.

(11:55)   
**So why didn’t you say anything?**

(11:56)   
I don’t know, Pen. I didn’t know what to do. I thought she wanted to go.   
(11:56)   
What if she wanted to go?

(11:59)   
**And what if she’s only going because she couldn’t get what she really wanted?**

(12:01pm)   
I don’t follow.

(12:02)   
**You, you dingus!!!**   
(12:02)   
**I may not know Y/N, but I have a feeling she’s probably still a little scared after the whole coffee shop incident.**

(12:04)   
God.   
(12:04)   
I really ruined everything, didn’t I?

(12:06)   
**Don’t go there, Spencer. You did not. Why don’t you just tell her??**

(12:08)   
I don’t even know what I would say.

(12:09)   
**How about “Hi my name is Dr. Spencer Reid and I’m hopelessly in love with you and I wimped out about meeting you and now I’m afraid it’s too late but I don’t want it to be too late!!!!”**

(12:11)   
...I don’t think that will work.

(12:12)   
**What are you so afraid of????**

(12:13)   
I don’t know.   
(12:13)   
Everything.

(12:14)   
**SPENCER.** **  
**

(12:16)   
What if she goes on this date and she falls in love and she never speaks to me again and I missed my chance?

(12:17)   
**I really don’t think that’s what’s going to happen.**

(12:18)   
But what if it does!!!

(12:19)   
**You gotta trust me.  
  
** **** *****  
  
**Sun 28 Feb (2:08am)** **  
** _ He wasn’t you. _

(2:21)   
Sorry?

(2:24)   
_ I wanted him to be you.  
  
_ *****  
  
**Tues 2 Mar (8:37pm)** **  
** _ In the early Roman calendar, March was actually the first month. _

(8:46)   
Because of the first day of spring with the vernal equinox.

(8:57)   
_ So, on that note of new beginnings… _ _   
_ (8:57)   
_ Forget what I said the other day. _

(8:59)   
You know I can’t.

(9:00)   
_ Then why didn’t you say anything? _

(9:01)   
I’m sorry. I just- I didn’t know what to say.

(9:09)   
_ It doesn’t matter. I was just being stupid and childish. _

(9:11)   
I don’t think so. What’s going on? What happened?

(9:12)   
_ Ugh, fuck Spencer!! _

(9:12)   
What?

(9:13)   
_ I don’t know. I feel like I’m losing my goddamn mind. _

(9:15)   
Why? What’s wrong?

(9:17)   
_ You, you dumbass. _ _   
_ (9:17)   
_ I don’t know. I don’t even know you, but I went on that date. _ _   
_ (9:18)   
_ And he wasn’t you. _   
(9:18)   
_ I’m sorry, this is absolutely fucking ridiculous. Ignore me. _

(9:21)   
I don’t think it’s ridiculous.

(9:23)   
_ You don’t even want to fucking meet me, I’m being stupid. God, I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said anything. _

(9:25)   
It’s not that, Y/N. I promise. I told you what happened.   
(9:25)   
We can try again. *I* can try again. I’m sorry I messed everything up last time.

(9:27)   
_ No. I don’t want to meet you just because you feel some sense of obligation. _

(9:28)   
It’s not like that.

(9:30)   
_ It sure fucking feels like it. _

(9:31)   
It wouldn’t be. I swear to you.

(9:33)   
_ Nothing’s changed. I’m sorry, I just can’t do it. I can’t sit there and look like a goddamn idiot when you don’t show up again. _

(9:35)   
Y/N, please. I made a mistake, and I wouldn’t put you through that again.   
(9:35)   
What can I do to make this right?

(9:37)   
_ You didn’t do anything. It’s just me. I'm being ridiculous. _   
(9:37)   
_ I need some time. _

(9:39)   
For what?

(9:40)   
_ I don’t know, Spencer. To fucking think. To get my shit together. To stop wishing my real life date was with a person I have literally never met? To figure out what the fuck is wrong with me? I don’t know. _ _   
_ (9:40)   
_ I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have texted you. _

(9:41)   
Please don’t say that. You can always text me.   
(9:41)   
Always.

(9:42)   
_ I’ll talk to you later.  
  
_ *****

**Tues 2 Mar (9:57pm)** **  
** I think I have emotional whiplash.

(10:04)   
**Uh oh, what’s going on??**

(10:07)   
She doesn’t want to talk to me.   
(10:08)   
This is it. She’s never going to speak to me again. And I don’t even know why. I don’t know what’s happening and I don’t know how to fix it.   
(10:09)   
I scared her away. I knew that this would happen. I knew it.

(10:11)   
**Sweetness, I don’t think that’s what happened.** **  
** (10:12)   
**You guys land in 30. I have a bottle of tequila with your name on it. My place??**

(10:15)   
Ugh, tequila?

(10:17)   
**Fine, the tequila has my name on it. You can have the wine.**

(10:20)   
See you soon.   
(10:21)   
Thanks, Pen. I really should start paying you.

(10:23)   
**No way, genius. Anything for you.  
  
** **** *****

**Tues 16 Mar (3:47pm)** **  
** I think it’s time.

(3:49)   
**For you to love me forever???? Been there, done that.**

(3:52)   
Do not make me smack you.

(3:53)   
**We all know that you’re all talk, sugar.** **  
** (3:53)   
**Wait…...intervention time??? Have you finally cracked??!!!**

(3:54)   
I can’t fucking take it anymore. Kid looks like a damn kicked puppy.   
(3:55)   
TWO WEEKS.   
(3:56)   
Two fucking weeks watching his little mopey ass sulking around the bullpen.

(3:56)   
**Oh I know, it would be pathetic if it wasn’t so heartbreaking.**

(3:57)   
It’s still pretty pathetic.

(3:59)   
**Oh shut up!!!** **  
** (4:00)   
**They’re both just being idiots who are *obviously* into each other.** **  
** (4:00)   
**Honestly, I think Y/N is pulling a Spencer and freaking out.** **  
** (4:01)   
**Operation Lovenerds is a GO.**

(4:02)   
I regret this already.

(4:04)   
**Just let it go, baby. You know I know what I’m doing.**

(4:05)   
That’s the scariest part.


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for each and every comment, I hope you know that I read them all and love them all very very much!! Xoxo
> 
> Spencer | _Reader_ | **Penelope** | Derek

**Fri 19 Mar (8:49pm)** **  
****What are you doing tomorrow?**

(9:01)  
 _Penelope? Did you text me by mistake?_

(9:03)  
 **Oh honey, I never do anything by mistake.** **  
**(9:04)  
 **I think we need to talk. Coffee?**

(9:21)  
 _...that would be really nice actually._ _  
_(9:22)  
 _Okay, sure._

(9:24)  
 **I’ll text you the deets.  
  
** *****

 **Sun 21 Mar (9:32pm)** **  
**_I’m sorry, Spencer._ _  
_(9:33)  
 _I freaked out. And you didn't deserve the way I treated you._

(9:47)  
It’s so good to hear from you. I missed you.

(9:51)  
 _I’ve missed you too._ _  
_(9:52)  
 _A little birdie talked some sense into me._

(9:55)  
A little birdie?

(10:01)  
 _A magician never reveals her secrets._ _  
_(10:02)  
 _So how are things?_

(10:07)  
Oh, you know. The usual. Serial killers never take a break.

(10:09)  
 _Why don’t you talk more about work?_

(10:12)  
It’s just-  
(10:12)  
It’s nice to talk about something else. Sometimes it feels like my entire life revolves around work and all that- that darkness.

(10:15)  
 _Fair._ _  
_(10:16)  
 _Do you have any pets?_

(10:18)  
Wow, talk about a segue.

(10:19)  
 _As I’ve said, waste of time. Might as well get right into it._ _  
_(10:20)  
 _I do believe this counts as “something else.”_

(10:22)  
True. I do have a fish. Work doesn’t really allow for anything more than that.  
(10:23)  
Well he’s not technically a fish, but colloquially he is.

(10:25)  
 _Fish!!! What’s their name?? Tell me everything!!_ _  
_(10:25)  
 _Wait._ _  
_(10:26)  
 _I was gonna pretend that that made sense but what the FUCK does that mean?_

(10:27)  
If I had known this would make you this happy, I would have brought him up much sooner.  
(10:28)  
Nikola. And he’s an axolotl which is actually a neotenic salamander, but they’re commonly referred to as a walking fish.

(10:30)  
 _Oh my god an axolotl!!! Those things are incredible, I love it. If you don’t send me a picture immediately we are through._ _  
_(10:30)  
 _Believe it or not, your friendly neighborhood librarian actually does know what they are._ _  
_(10:31)  
 _If Edgar wouldn’t eat Nikola, I’m sure they could be great friends._

(10:33)  
The unfortunate predator versus prey conundrum.  
(10:33)  
[](https://www.flickr.com/photos/idmakeitbehave/50654835137/in/dateposted-public/)  
  
(10:34)  
 _Yeah, a difficult conundrum to overcome. And he’s beautiful I LOVE him!!!!!!!_

(10:36)  
I’ll be sure to pass along your compliments.

(10:38)  
 _Are we okay?_

(10:39)  
Are you okay?

(10:41)  
 _I think so._

(10:43)  
Then yes, we’re okay.  
(10:44)  
Do you want to talk about what happened the other week?

(10:47)  
 _Not yet._ _  
_(10:48)  
 _I’m sorry. And I’m sorry I yelled at you. Or text-yelled at you or whatever._ _  
_(10:48)  
 _It wasn’t fair of me to make assumptions about you standing me up again and to use that whole thing against you._

(10:51)  
You don’t need to be sorry.  
(10:51)  
I’m just happy to have you in my life.

(10:53)  
 _Right back at you.  
  
_ *****  
  
 **Sun 21 Mar (10:57pm)** **  
**Thank you, Pen.

(11:01)  
 **It’s my magic touch, Boy Wonder.** **  
**(11:01)  
 **Seriously, though. Anything for you. I mean it.  
  
** *********

 **Mon 22 Mar (9:01am)** **  
****Stage 1: Get the Idiots Talking Again is complete.** **  
**(9:02)  
 **I hope you’re ready for Stage 2.**

(9:06)  
How did I let you talk me into this? 

(9:08)  
 **I am irresistible.**

(9:09)  
Oh yeah, that ;) 

(9:12)  
 **Stage 2 is going to be much harder. Stage 1 was easy with all of my charm.**

(9:13)  
You’re wildly humble, mama. 

(9:14)  
 **You know I’m right!!!**

(9:16)  
Fair. Why's Stage 2 harder? 

(9:17)  
 **Because our Boy Genius is a freaking moron, that’s why!!**

(9:18)  
You make an *excellent* point. 

(9:19)  
 **He’s scared. It was easy to convince Y/N to talk to him again, but I think she’s still freaking out.** **  
**(9:19)  
 **She likes him. Like I TOLD HIM. But now she’s scared too. Two giant scared babies!!!**

(9:21)  
You should start charging for your services. 

(9:22)  
 **Wiser words have never been spoken. I’ve already considered it.**  
(9:22)  
 **I’m free for you though, angel. ;)**

(9:23)  
I should hope so!!   
(9:23)  
:)  
  
*****

 **Fri 26 Mar (3:19am)** **  
**I can’t sleep.

(3:26)  
 _Me neither. Why do we have such fucked up sleep schedules?_

(3:29)  
Probably a combination of our work schedules and our residual trauma.

(3:30)  
 _Whoa. Spencer._

(3:33)  
What?

(3:34)  
 _Nothing, that is just simultaneously the funniest and realest thing I’ve heard you say._ _  
_(3:34)  
 _I’ve just been read._

(3:36)  
I’m not sure I know what that means.

(3:37)  
 _Oh you innocent child._

(3:39)  
Remember when you thought I was 80?

(3:40)  
 _God, that feels like a lifetime ago._ _  
_(3:41)  
 _You still could be 80. I haven’t given up on it completely._

(3:44)  
You are impossible.

(3:45)  
 _You love it._

(3:47)  
You know I do.

(3:50)  
 _Can we do another Q &A? I don’t think I’m going to sleep any time soon. _

(3:52)  
Only if you start.

(3:53)  
 _Ugh, that means I have to decide if I go for the surface bullshit or something deeper._

(3:55)  
Why not both?

(3:57)  
 _Fair point._ _  
_(3:58)  
 _Fuck._

(4:01)  
Regretting your game choice already?

(4:02)  
 _Sh, let me think._ _  
_(4:03)  
 _What’s the best lesson you’ve learned from someone who hurt you?_

(4:06)  
Alright. I see that we’re going off the deep end.

(4:08)  
 _It’s 4am. There’s no other way._

(4:14)  
I guess my answer would have to be that sometimes you’re not going to be enough for someone. No matter what you do or how hard you try.

(4:16)  
 _Oh, Spencer._

(4:17)  
You asked!

(4:18)  
 _I did. I hope someone else has taught you that there are people that you’ll always be enough for._

(4:23)  
What’s something about yourself that’s hard to admit?

(4:25)  
 _Damn. Right to it I see._ _  
_(4:26)  
 _I guess how often I use humor as a way of deflecting. It’s hard sharing my actual feelings with people. It’s easier to just hide them and pretend I don’t have any._ _  
_(4:28)  
 _How old is Nikola? Also do you celebrate his birthday?_

(4:31)  
Is that your question?

(4:32)  
 _Yeah, I need a breather from the deep shit._

(4:34)  
Fair. He’s 4. And yes I do.  
(4:34)  
Don’t judge me for that.  
(4:35)  
Do you feel like you need to pretend with me?

(4:38)  
 _I would never! You’ve seen photographic proof that I celebrate Edgar’s birthday._ _  
_(4:38)  
 _...And no. I don’t._

(4:39)  
Good. You don’t need to be anything other than you.

(4:40)  
 _You are too good to be true, pocket-agent._

(4:42)  
Fairly certain I exist.

(4:43)  
 _Wow, only fairly certain??_

(4:44)  
Always a slim chance that this is all a simulation.

(4:45)  
 _Or one really good fever dream._ _  
_(4:46)  
 _What would young-you not believe about your life today?_

(4:49)  
You are really going for it with these questions.  
(4:50)  
I don’t think he would believe any of it. I think he’d be surprised we made it out. And especially surprised about the whole FBI thing.

(4:51)  
 _Out of where?_

(4:53)  
Just… out of my hometown I guess. Out of my little life. Away from all the painful memories.  
(4:54)  
Not that it all got instantaneously better… I mean, some of that hurt will always be there. And I guess that with my job something’s always going to be painful. But I made it out.

(4:55)  
 _Oh, Spence. I wish I could magically take away that pain. I can’t think of another person more deserving of good things._

(4:56)  
You do.

(4:57)  
 _I do what?_

(4:58)  
You do take away the pain.  
(4:59)  
God, I’m sorry, I went off on a whole tangent. What about you? What would you not believe about your life now?

(5:00)  
 _You never have to be sorry for something like this, Spence. You can tell me anything._ _  
_(5:00)  
 _...and kind of the same. Besides the agent thing._ _  
_(5:01)  
 _There was a long time where I thought it was over. It being… well, everything. Everything was so good until it wasn’t. And then everything was so… empty. Dark and empty. I thought it would be like that forever. You said something the other day about your work and all that darkness. And I understand._  
(5:01)  
 _Well, I don't *exactly* understand since I'm not hunting serial killers for a living. But I get the darkness. Sometimes it feels like it'll last forever, but it doesn't._

(5:02)  
I’m really glad we were both wrong.  
(5:02)  
And you make everything light.

(5:03) **  
**_**~Incoming call~** _**  
**“Y/N?”

_“Spence, I just- I just, um, I don’t know. I wanted to hear your voice. And I know you’ll say there’s nothing that statistically backs this up, but I just wanted to say… I believe that there’s something out there that led us here. To each other.”_

“The lack of statistics doesn’t make it any less true.”

_“...you astound me. Always.”_

“I meant what I said, Y/N. About you making everything light. You just- you just do.”

_“God, I....”_

“What?”

_“I just really- I just... nevermind.”_

“...what is it?”

_“You just- you make me really, really happy. Those two weeks being stupid and not talking to you- I just... I didn't realize how much I would miss you. And I feel really lucky that you’re in my life.”_

"Oh, Y/N..."

_"Too much?"_

“No, never. You're never too much. And you make me happy too. Happier than I can even put into words.”

_“Wow, finally rendered that ginormous brain of yours speechless? I must be good.”_

“Yeah... yeah you are.”

_“...thank you, Spence.”_

“For what?”

_“Oh, you know. Just… just everything.”_


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's the final countdown!!
> 
> Spencer | _Reader_ | **Penelope** | Derek

**Sun 28 Mar (1:21am)** **  
** Tell me something.

(1:23)  
_Hi to you too, dingus._ _  
_ (1:23)  
_What’s your question?_

(1:25)  
No, just tell me something.  
(1:25)  
Anything.

(1:26)  
_Cashing in on that distraction talent of mine??_

(1:27)  
If that’s alright.

(1:28)  
_Oh, Spence, of course. I hope everything’s okay._ _  
_ (1:28)  
_Okay, distraction... charm..._ _  
_ (1:29)  
_Oh!!! Alright you’re gonna think I’m nuts, but you know those Bathtub Marys??_

(1:30)  
I do...

(1:31)  
_Duh, of course you do. Who do I think I’m talking to?_ _  
_ (1:31)  
_Anyway, I’ve only seen like one or two that have the bathtub but no Mary but they haunt my dreams!! Or more accurately they crack me the fuck up._

(1:32)  
This is so oddly specific.

(1:33)  
_Have you ever seen one??? It’s so spooky! Like… there was either a miracle or a crime here._

(1:34)  
I haven’t seen a bathtub sans Mary, no.

(1:35)  
_Boy are you in luck tonight!!_ _  
_ (1:35)  
[](https://www.flickr.com/photos/idmakeitbehave/50670127321/in/dateposted-public/)

(1:36)  
Alright, you may have a point... Quite off-putting.

(1:37)  
_I always have a point!!_ _  
_ (1:37)  
_Are you alright?_

(1:39)  
**_~Incoming call~_ ** **_  
_ ** _“Hey, Spence. My distraction not up to par for you tonight?”_

“...”

_“...Spence, what’s going on?”_

“I-I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have bothered you. I, um-”

_“You’re never bothering me. What’s on your mind?”_

“I just- I- you know how sometimes you start thinking and you can’t make it stop?”

_“Of course.”_

“I started thinking about- about all the things I haven’t been able to do. And all the things that I thought I would do and how it feels- it feels like-”

_“Whoa, Spence, slow down. Take a breath.”_

“It- it feels like-”

_“Hey, hey, baby. Breathe.”_

“...It, um, it feels like it’s too late. Like- have you ever had that feeling that your future is somehow behind you?”

_“Mhm, I have. I know what you mean.”_

“It’s just- it’s just that. I’m sorry, I don’t know why I just said all that, I just. I couldn’t stop thinking about it-”

_“It’s not.”_

“What’s not?”

_“Your future. It isn’t behind you. It’s all right there. There for the taking.”_

“You- you think so?”

_“Of course. It’s not like you’re actually 80.”_

“Very funny.”

_“That’s my specialty. But seriously, there’s still time. Your future’s still there, I promise.”_

“Maybe, maybe even…”

_“Maybe what?”_

“N-nevermind.”

_“You can say whatever’s on your mind, pocket-agent. You know I don’t judge you.”_

“Just- maybe even ours?”

_“...oh. Our- our future?”_

“Yeah, um, I’m sorry, forget I-”

_“Oh, Spence, yes. Our future’s right in front of us.”_

“There for the taking?”

_“Yeah- yeah, it is.”_

“I, um, I like that. I like that a lot.”

 _“Me too.”  
  
_ *****  
  
**Mon 29 Mar (9:12am)** **  
** She called me baby.

(9:14)  
**SPENCER!!!!!!!**

(9:15)  
I don’t- I don’t know why I told you that. Ignore me.

(9:16)  
**Oh boy oh boy, you know I cannot. EEEEKKKK!!!** **  
** (9:16)  
**You know that Hozier song???**

(9:17)  
...you know that I don’t.

(9:18)  
**Jackie and Wilson. Look it up.** **  
** (9:18)  
**You can thank me later.**

(9:19)  
My thank you list to you keeps growing.

(9:20)  
**I accept cash or VISA. Xoxox <3  
  
*******

 **Tues 30 Mar (10:24pm)** **  
** _Happy 6 month text-iversary._ _  
_ (10:24)  
_And yes, I just made that up._

(10:33)  
Wow. Six months.  
(10:33)  
I’m very grateful for Garcia’s hard to read handwriting.

(10:35)  
_Me too. I owe her a hug next time I see her._

(10:37)  
Next time??

(10:38)  
_Fuck._ _  
_ (10:38)  
_I uh... kind of assumed she told you?_

(10:41)  
She is so sneaky.

(10:42)  
_I love her. She’s fantastic._

(10:44)  
That she is.  
  
*****

 **Tues 30 Mar (11:02pm)** **  
** You met Y/N???

(11:05)  
**Wow, it took less time than I thought for you to figure it out.** **  
** (11:05)  
**Please don’t be mad!!!**

(11:07)  
I’m not mad, Pen.  
(11:08)  
I guess I’m jealous? I don’t know. It feels very strange.

(11:09)  
**For what it’s worth, I love her.** **  
** (11:09)  
**You don’t need to be jealous, genius. You can meet her too. Isn’t it about time??**

(11:11)  
Funny, she told me she loves you.  
(11:12)  
I don’t know…

(11:14)  
**Oh come the fuck on!!!!!!**

(11:15)  
What’s with all the swearing? Relax.

(11:16)  
**I cannot relax when you insist on being so goddamn stubborn!!** **  
** (11:16)  
**It’s been 6 months. SIX. S. I. X.**

(11:18)  
I know how to spell six.

(11:19)  
**And apparently that’s ALL you know.**

(11:21)  
I didn’t know you could be so mean.

(11:22)  
**Ugh, I mean it with love, you know I do. But come on, Spencer. What’s stopping you?**

(11:25)  
I don’t know. I mean, what’s changed in the last two months?  
(11:25)  
I guess I’m just still scared. And after what she said last month, I don’t think she really wants to meet me. She apologized for saying I would stand her up again, but I can’t really blame her for saying it in the first place.

(11:27)  
**She’s scared too! And probably confused, but I really really don’t think she meant that. It’s okay to be afraid, but you just have to go with it. Life is scary, but you’re never going to get the rewards without a little risk.**

(11:29)  
What if she actually never wants to meet me? What if I really did ruin it?

(11:31)  
**I thought we were well past this!! You need to trust her, Spencer. Take her words at face-value. Isn’t she the one who told you to be straight up with her?** **  
** (11:32)  
**Does her wishing her date was you mean *nothing*???** **  
** (11:32)  
**She called you BABY. Come the fuck on!!**

(11:33)  
Good point.  
(11:33)  
What do I do?

(11:34)  
**Oh angel, I thought you’d never ask.  
  
*******

 **Wed 31 Mar (8:32am)** **  
** **Stage 2 is a GO.**

(8:35)  
Are you not at work right now?? 

(8:36)  
**Can’t risk leaving the batcave and having Reid see me.**

(8:37)  
Sneaky sneaky woman. 

(8:38)  
**One of my many talents ;)**

*****

 **Fri 2 Apr (7:23pm)** **  
** Are you working tomorrow?

(7:58)  
_No. Why?_

(8:01)  
I have a mission for you. Should you choose to accept it.

(8:03)  
_Spencer!!!!_

(8:04)  
What?

(8:05)  
_I thought that was my line!!_

(8:07)  
I figured it was my turn.  
(8:07)  
If that’s alright.

(8:08)  
_That is *more* than alright. I am so excited._

(8:10)  
Uh oh, that’s a lot of pressure for my first mission.

(8:11)  
_I believe in you._  
(8:11)  
_Always._

(8:13)  
:)

(8:14)  
_So what does this mission entail??_

(8:15)  
Spoilers.

(8:16)  
_I reallllllly hope that’s a Doctor Who reference._

(8:17)  
It definitely is.

(8:18)  
_I should have expected as much from you._ _  
_ (8:18)  
_Dork._

(8:20)  
Hey, you knew the reference!

(8:21)  
_Never said I wasn’t also a dork._

(8:22)  
Good.

*****

 **Sat 3 Apr (10:47am)** **  
** _Tell me!!!_

(11:01)  
What happened to all of that patience talk?

(11:03)  
_That was for you not me!!_ _I wanna know!_

(11:07)  
38.8859° N, 76.9966° W

(11:09)  
_Oh Spencer, you do listen!_

(11:11)  
I always listen to you.  
(11:12)  
Can you make it there for 2pm?

(11:15)  
_Ooh and a time constraint? I am SO intrigued._

(11:18)  
Again with the pressure.

(11:19)  
_You worry too much, dear. I’d enjoy any mission you gave me._

(11:21)  
Any??

(11:22)  
_Okay, now you make me have some doubts._ _  
_ (11:22)  
_I’m just kidding._

(11:24)  
Believe it or not, I knew that.  
(11:25)  
So, 2pm? Yes?

(11:27)  
_I wouldn’t dare miss it._

(11:29)  
Excellent.  
(11:30)  
I suppose I should say godspeed.

(11:32)  
_Wow, you really are starting to sound like me._

(11:35)  
I do believe you once brought up the notion of transference.

(11:37)  
_I’m so excited, Spencer!! Yay!_

~

(3:42pm)  
_Oh my god._ _  
_ (3:42)  
_Oh my fucking god._ _  
_ (3:43)  
_I am deceased._

(3:49)  
I really hope not.  
(3:50)  
I was a bit worried when I didn’t hear from you.

(3:52)  
_Sorry I was busy talking to THE David Rossi!!!!!_ _  
_ (3:52)  
_SPENCER!!!_

(3:54)  
Y/N!!!

(3:55)  
_I’m speechless._ _  
_ (3:55)  
_Well, not speechless, but I have no coherent thoughts._

(3:57)  
As opposed to the rest of the time?

(3:59)  
_I’m too happy to yell at you for being sassy._

(4:01)  
I take it you enjoyed the mission?

(4:03)  
_Spencer._ _  
_ (4:03)  
_I got to listen to his book talk and get my book signed by him AND we got to have coffee together???_ _  
_ (4:04)  
_I beyond enjoyed it. Holy crap. I cannot._

(4:06)  
Coffee too? That wasn’t my doing.

(4:07)  
_I know. We got to talking and just couldn’t stop!_ _  
_ (4:08)  
_Turns out he’s heard about me. I’d assume that’s mostly Penelope’s doing._

(4:11)  
You assume correctly.  
(4:12)  
Wow, now you’ve met two of my coworkers.

(4:15)  
_I love them!!!!!_  
(4:15)  
_God, this was the absolute best thank you so much! You are a marvelous, marvelous human._

(4:17)  
You are very welcome.

*****

 **Sun 4 Apr (11:04am)** **  
** I can’t believe you and Rossi have both met Y/N now.

(11:10)  
**It could be you, Genius!!!** **  
** (11:11)  
**I take it she liked your mission?**

(11:13)  
She loved it.

(11:15)  
**Of course she did.** **  
** (11:15)  
**Man, Spencer, you truly are Romeo.**

(11:17)  
Thanks, Pen.

(11:18)  
**So, you ready to meet her??**

(11:20)  
I don’t know.

(11:21)  
**Spencer!!!!**

(11:23)  
Yeah, I know.

(11:24)  
**The *future*, Spencer!! YOUR future!! Come on!! My little rom-com loving heart cannot take this anymore.**

(11:25)  
I knew I shouldn’t have told you that.

(11:26)  
**You’re killing me here!!**

*****

 **Sun 4 Apr (11:44am)** **  
** **Alright, hot stuff. They’re getting warmed up but we still need more.** **  
** (11:45)  
**Stage 2- get Spencer to make a move (*any* move) is complete.**

(11:51)  
Jesus. They really gotta make it difficult for us, don’t they? 

(11:53)  
**You know what they say, nothing worth having comes easy.**

(11:54)  
It *could* come a little easier if Reid wasn’t so damn stubborn. 

(11:55)  
**I can’t disagree with that.** **  
** (11:56)  
**So- you ready for Stage 3?!!**

(11:57)  
I’m always ready for you, mama.   
(11:57)  
Still frightened though. 

(11:59)  
**Relax, baby.** **_  
_ ** (12:00pm)  
**It’ll all be worth it.**

(12:01pm)  
Okay, okay.   
(12:01)  
It’s go time. 

(12:02)  
**Where’s your enthusiasm???**

(12:03)  
Ugh. 

(12:04)  
**:))) xoxoxo**

(12:05)  
Fine, only for you :)   
(12:05)  
It’s GO TIME!!!! 

(12:06)  
**That’s more like it.**


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> !!!!
> 
> Spencer | _Reader_ | **Penelope** | Derek

**Tues 6 Apr (10:21pm)** **  
**_I can’t stop thinking about the mission!! Amazing. Ugh._

(10:43)  
I don’t think there’s anywhere I can go from here.

(10:45)  
 _Fair, you’ve set the bar reallllly high._ _  
_ (10:45)   
_But for real, there’s plenty of room for you to go from here._

(10:49)  
How is everything? Aside from meeting your hero.

(10:51)  
 _Oh you know, typical late night weekday at the library._ _  
_ (10:52)   
_Aka I’m hiding in the basement again._

(10:54)  
I suppose I should expect as much from you. Enjoying the creepy vibes?

(10:55)  
 _Wow did you just say vibes?? You really *have* been spending too much time talking to me. And yes, yes I am._ _  
_ (10:55)  
[](https://www.flickr.com/photos/idmakeitbehave/50680802692/in/dateposted-public/)

(10:59)  
I can be hip.   
(10:59)   
Okay, no I can’t.   
(11:00)   
Alright, fairly creepy. What’s even down there?

(11:01)  
 _You are many things, pocket-agent, but I don’t think hip is one of them._ _  
_ (11:01)   
_Honestly almost nothing in this corner. Just microfiches. Looooots of microfiches._

(11:03)  
That’s actually quite neat.

(11:04)  
 _Of course you think that, you nerd._ _  
_ (11:04)   
_:)_

(11:06)  
You’re a nerd too!

(11:07)  
 _Obviously. I wouldn’t have it any other way._ _  
_ (11:08)   
_Oh, speaking of nerds! I found some books that made me think of you._

(11:10)  
I should probably be offended by that statement.

(11:11)  
 _Probably, but we all know you aren’t.  
  
_ (11:12)   
Fair.   
(11:12)   
Alright, share your findings.

(11:14)  
 _Hold your horses._ _  
_ (11:14)  
[](https://www.flickr.com/photos/idmakeitbehave/50680727571/in/dateposted-public/)

(11:16)  
Those are all quite specific.

(11:17)  
 _You can’t possibly tell me you haven’t read any of these._

(11:19)  
Oh, no, I’ve read 7 of the ones that have legible titles.   
(11:19)   
I’ll have to find the rest, however.

(11:21)  
 _You read them for fun, didn’t you?_

(11:22)  
...yes.

(11:24)  
 _I love it._

_*****_

**Tues 6 Apr (11:47pm)** **  
**You need to stop me before I say something stupid and put my foot in my mouth.

(11:49)  
 **Spencer!!! What’s going on?**

(11:51)  
Remember what I said?   
(11:51)   
About falling in love with someone you’ve never met?

(11:52)  
 **How could I FORGET!!!!!!!** **  
**(11:52)  
 **Oh my god. You wanted to tell her. You absolute lovesick puppy!!!**

(11:53)  
We were talking about something ridiculous and she said “I love it” and my first thought was just...   
(11:53)   
I’m being absurd. I’m creating things in my head, falsifying emotions based on random conversations. It’s not real. Delete this from your memory.

(11:55)  
 **You absolutely know that I cannot and I will not. And it’s okay to let yourself feel things, Spencer!! It’s real. It may not be typical or normal but there’s something there. Something very real. You know it. I know you do.** **  
**(11:55)  
 **I love love!!!!! And I love you, you dingus.**

(11:56)  
Ugh.   
(11:56)   
Love you too, Pen. Thank you for listening to me say stupid things.

(11:57)  
 **No, no, no, Boy Wonder. *Lovey-dovey* not stupid.**

(11:59)  
That kind of feels like the same thing.

(11:59)  
 **Absolutely not.**

*****

 **Wed 7 Apr (11:01pm)** **  
**_I’m going to learn how to play the glockenspiel._

(11:12)  
....alrighty, I’ll bite.

(11:13)  
 _“Alrighty?”_ _  
_ (11:13)   
_You’re so cute._

(11:15)  
Are you not going to explain the unprompted glockenspiel learning?

(11:16)  
 _Ignoring me as usual, I see._

(11:17)  
You started this conversation!!

(11:18)  
 _I live to torture you._

(11:19)  
Gee, thanks.

(11:20)  
 _You’re very welcome._ _  
_ (11:20)   
_Anyway, yes. I’m going to learn how to play the glockenspiel._

(11:21)  
...I hope you’re not planning on following in NXM’s footsteps.

(11:23)  
 _Ugh, Spencer, why must you bring him up!!! Glockenspiel, not xylophone!!_

(11:24)  
You started that one, too.

(11:25)  
 _Fair._ _  
_ (11:25)   
_I just wanna play Disney songs on my little plastic rainbow glockenspiel!! Let me live._

(11:26)  
You’re already in possession of this glockenspiel, aren’t you?

(11:27)  
 _Oh hell yeah. You’re going to be subject to *many* a concert once I get the hang of it._

(11:28)  
I look forward to it.

(11:30)  
 _...seriously? No witty retort??_ _  
_ (11:30)   
_You’re really going to put up with my glockenspiel playing?_

(11:31)  
I think I might even enjoy it.

(11:32)  
 _You’re a filthy liar._

(11:33)  
I think I’d enjoy anything you do.

(11:36)  
 _You’re gross._

(11:37)  
Excuse me??

(11:38)  
 _You’re gross and adorable and I love it._

(11:39)  
Thank you?

(11:40)  
 _You’re very welcome._

(11:41)  
You’re so strange.

(11:42)  
 _And you’re stuck with me!! Big sorry._

(11:44)  
No one I’d rather be stuck with.

(11:45)  
 _Yuck._ _  
_ (11:45)   
_ <3 _ _  
_ _  
_ (11:46)   
:))  
  
*****

 **Thurs 8 Apr (8:47pm)** **  
****I have a question for you, dear.**

(8:53)  
 _Pen!!! Hi love, what’s up?_

(8:54)  
 **First of all: I love you, you’re so cute.** **  
**(8:55)  
 **Second of all: what’s up with you and our Boy Genius?? You know… like is it time to meet in person??**

(8:57)  
 _!!! I think you’re the cute one._ _  
_ (8:58)   
_And I want to, I really *really* do, but I don’t know what to do. Especially after last time. You know what happened…_

(9:01)  
 **Oh yes, I do. He may be a genius, but he can be a moron sometimes.**

(9:03)  
 _I’m a moron too. I went on that date and then I said those things and made everything weird._

(9:04)  
 **Everything’s fine, I promise you!!!**

(9:06)  
 _Oh, Pen. I hope you’re right. I really…_

(9:07)  
 **What??**

(9:08)  
 _He’s just really important to me. I don’t want to mess this up._

(9:09)  
 **You sound just like Spencer.**

(9:10)  
 _What do you mean?_

(9:11)  
 **Two big scaredy cats.**

(9:12)  
 _Hey! Meanie!!!_ _  
_ (9:12)   
_I thought we were friends!!_

(9:13)  
 **Hehehe of course we are.** **  
**(9:13)  
 **!!!!! I have a proposition for you….**

(9:14)  
 _Spence did say you were very sneaky._

(9:15)  
 **Oh yeah, honey ;)**

(9:16)  
 _I’m all ears._

*****

 **Fri 9 Apr (7:02pm)** **  
** What are you doing tomorrow? 

(7:24)  
This feels like a trap…

(7:26)  
Come on, man!    
(7:27)   
When have I ever led you astray?  
  
(7:29)   
I don’t think you want me to answer that.

(7:30)  
Fair.    
(7:30)   
Whatever. I heard there’s a festival downtown. You in? 

(7:33)  
...the Library of Congress book festival?? You cannot be serious.

(7:35)  
Shut the fuck up. You can get something nice for Y/N, I want to get something nice for my mama.    
(7:35)   
It’s a win-win. 

(7:39)  
Well if it’s for your mother…

(7:40)  
I knew I could count on you. I need that genius brain of yours to help me pick out the perfect gift. 

(7:43)  
Fine. I’ll go.

(7:45)  
Don’t sound so excited, Pretty Boy. 

(7:47)  
I had been planning on spending the day with Nikola but I suppose I can make an exception.

(7:48)  
Why you gotta bring him up! I hate that thing! 

(7:49)  
Why must you always be so rude to your nephew! All he’s ever done is love you.

(7:50)  
The beady eyes, Reid! The fucking beady eyes! 

(7:51)  
You want me to go or not?

(7:53)  
Ugh, fine.    
(7:53)   
He’s... lovely. 

(7:54)  
Aright, I’ll go.

(7:55)  
You’re a cruel man. 

*****

 **Fri 9 Apr (7:57pm)** **  
** We are a GO. 

(7:59)  
 **HA!!! I knew you’d get into the mission!! I’ve successfully corrupted you.**

(8:00)  
Yeah, yeah, laugh it up.    
(8:00)   
You want my help or not? 

(8:01)  
 **Always, babe.**

(8:02)  
Wow, I can’t believe this is going to happen.    
(8:02)   
He’s gonna hate us. 

(8:03)  
 **No, he won’t!** **  
**(8:03)  
 **...at least not for long. It’ll be *so* worth it.**

*****

 **Sat 10 Apr (11:12am)** **  
**_I’m gonna throw up._

(11:14)  
 **Relax!!!! It’s gonna be fine.**

(11:15)  
 _What if it’s not!!!!!!!_

(11:16)  
 **Honey. It will be. Deep breaths.**

(11:17)  
 _Okay okay. I’m calm. I’m fine._

(11:18)  
 **I’m so excited!!!!**

(11:19)  
 _Me too, Pen. Me too._

*****

 **Sat 10 Apr (3:02pm)** **  
** I’m peacing out. Go time. 

(3:03)  
 **Hells yes.  
  
** *****

 **Sat 10 Apr (3:04pm)** **  
****_~Incoming call~_ ** **_  
_** **“What’s up Boy Wonder? Aren’t you out with Derek?”**

“Yeah, yeah, I am. He went to grab food. I just- I wanted your opinion on what to get Y/N.”

**“You know her best, sweetie! Go with your gut!”**

“I don’t trust my gut.”

**“Ugh, Spencer-”**

“I know, I know.”

**“I have a feeling you’ll find the perfect thing.”**

“Not super helpful, Penelope.”

**“The *perfect* thing.”**

“What- what does that even mean?”

**“You’ll know it when you see it.”**

“Are you being purposefully obtuse? You know, that’s not really-”

**“Oh, sh! Go enjoy your nerd festival!”**

“I should have brought you instead of Derek. You’d at least be able to appreciate this a little more.”

**“Chocolate Thunder not exactly the best literary pal?”**

“He’s not complaining, so I’ll give him that at least. Although this whole thing was his idea.”

**“Oh yeah, anything for Fran.”**

“Can’t argue with that. Okay, I’ll talk to you later.”

**“Go forth and conquer, Good Doctor.”**

*****

 **Sat 10 Apr (3:10pm)** **  
****Your time to shine, baby.**

(3:11)  
 _Oof. Godspeed._

(3:12)  
 **Get ‘em!!!**

*****

 **Sat 10 Apr (3:13pm)** **  
**_38.889248°, -77.050636°_

(3:15)  
???   
(3:16)   
Wait. I’m here already.   
(3:16)   
What’s going on??

(3:17)  
 _Your next mission begins now._

(3:19)  
Y/N, what’s going on?   
(3:19)   
I guess I should have assumed you would know about a book festival. This is a little out of the blue though.

(3:20)  
 _The unexpected is what makes life possible._

(3:21)  
Ursula Le Guin.   
(3:21)   
I’m here already though. It’s a lovely festival.

(3:22)  
 _There’s one exhibit in particular I need you to go to._

(3:23)  
I’m waiting for my friend, but I can go when he’s back.

(3:24)  
 _He’ll know where to find you._

(3:25)  
What??   
(3:25)   
What on earth is going on?

(3:26)  
 _Do you trust me?_

(3:28)  
You know I do.

(3:29)  
 _There’s a children’s picture book exhibit. Shaped like a house.  
_

(3:30)  
Okay, I think I see it. I’m heading over.   
(3:34)   
Alright, I’m here. What do I do?

(3:35)  
 **_~Incoming call~_ **   
“Y/N? Um, hi?”

_“Hi, Spence.”_

“I’m really confused.”

_“I know-”_

“What am I doing here?”

_“See the copy of The Little Prince?”_

“Yeah, I do- oh, you were here?”

_“You got my note?”_

“Yeah, what’s-”

_“Just listen-”_

“What?”

_“Sh, just listen.”_

“Okay, okay.”

_“Okay, so… fuck. I knew what I was going to say.”_

“Should I be scared? I’m a little scared.”

_“No! Sh! You stubborn man. Let me think.”_

“Fine.”

_“Okay, so. I just- I wanted to tell you how much these last six months have meant to me. Spence, you know me better than anyone else does. Which is a little ridiculous given the circumstances, but I honestly wouldn’t have it any other way. I don’t even want to think about what would have happened if you never texted me by accident. If I didn’t ever get to know you.”_

“Y/N...”

_“Spence. And I know you’re scared. I’m scared too. It’s why you walked away from the coffee shop. It’s why I went on that stupid fucking date even though it was the last thing I wanted to do. I want you. I want- I want our future. I know it’s insane, but there’s a quote that I can’t stop thinking about. You know me, always with the damn quotes... Anyway, it goes like this: ‘I like to see people reunited, I like to see people run to each other, I like the kissing and the crying, I like the impatience, the stories that the mouth can't tell fast enough, the ears that aren't big enough, the eyes that can't take in all of the change, I like the hugging, the bringing together, the end of missing someone.’”_

“Jonathan- um, Jonathan Safran Foer.”

_“Of course you know it. Spence- I’m ready for the end of missing you.”_

“I don’t under-”

_“He also said ‘I hope that one day you'll have the experience of doing something you don't understand for someone you love.’ Well, I don’t quite understand what I’m doing and it doesn’t really make sense…”_

“What- what are you saying?”

_“Don’t- please don’t cry.”_

“Please, Y/N.”

_“Okay, my melodramatic speech is over.”_

“Y/N...”

_“Okay.”_

“Okay what?”

_“Turn around.”_

“I…”

_“Turn around. Before I lose my nerve.”_

“...”

_“Hi, Spence.”_

*****

 **Sat 10 Apr (4:11pm)** **  
****What’s going on!!! Where’s my update??**

(4:13)  
Oh my god, Baby Girl.    
(4:13)   
!!!!!!!!! 

(4:14)  
 **DETAILS!!!!**

(4:15)  
It’s time for celebratory drinks. 

(4:16)  
 **YES YES YES!!!!!! <3** **  
**(4:16)  
 **My place??**

(4:17)  
Be there in 20. 

(4:18)  
 **AHHHHH!!!**


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can't believe this is it!!! I have had _so_ much fun writing this and it's all due to all of you! Gigantic thank you to everyone who has kudo'd and commented! Your love and feedback is what made this so fun to write so thank you for coming along on this journey with me! This story has such a special place in my heart and I'm so glad I got to share it with you. Xoxo
> 
> (I have a new series (in regular fic format) starting sometime this week (because I just cannot be tamed) so be sure to keep a look out for that if that's something you might be interested in! <3)
> 
> Spencer | _Reader_ | **Penelope** | Derek

**Sun 11 Apr (10:47am)** **  
** **You big dumb idiot!!!!**

(10:52)  
Ugh. What is it this time?

(10:53)  
**Why didn’t you KISS HER???**

(10:56)  
Jesus Christ. Penelope.  
(10:57)  
Why do you know this!!

(10:58)  
**I have my ways.**

(11:01)  
Fucking Morgan.

(11:02)  
**Boy Wonder!!!!!** **  
** (11:02)  
**Language!!**

(11:04)  
Leave me alone!

(11:05)  
**You’re awfully grumpy for someone in *loooooove*** **  
** (11:06)  
**Everything good?**

(11:08)  
Beyond good.

(11:09)  
**!!!!!!** **  
** (11:09)  
**When’s the wedding?? I’m totally gonna play the video and embarrass the hell out of you both!!!! <33**

(11:11)  
We haven’t even been on a date yet.  
(11:11)  
….VIDEO????!!!  
(11:12)  
I hate Morgan. I hate him so very much.

(11:13)  
**You’ll thank us later ;) you two are SICKENINGLY perfect together. (Just like I said you’d be btw)** **  
** (11:13)  
**What’s the holdup!!!**

(11:14)  
Pen. We met *yesterday*

(11:15)  
**So??? You’ve known her for SIX months. You know how you feel about her.**

(11:16)  
You’re right.

(11:17)  
**That shouldn’t surprise you anymore, honey.**

(11:19)  
It doesn’t.  
(11:19)  
But what if she doesn’t want to go on a date? What if she just wants to be friends?  
(11:20)  
What if she doesn’t even want to be friends?  
(11:20)  
What if she hates me?

(11:21)  
**SPENCER WALTER REID.**

(11:22)  
That’s just cruel.

(11:23)  
**Did she say or do anything that could even remotely make you think that???**

(11:24)  
……..no.  
(11:24)  
She didn’t.

(11:26)  
**I can hear you grinning from here.** **  
** (11:26)  
**Ask her out!!! Go on a date!! Have beautiful genius babies!!**

(11:29)  
One step at a time.

(11:30)  
**Eeeeekkkkk!!!!!** **  
** (11:30)  
**Go get her, loverboy.**

(11:32)  
You’re lucky I love you.

(11:34)  
**I’m not the only one ;)))  
  
*******

 **Sun 11 Apr (4:08pm)** **  
** Hi.

(4:12)  
_That’s all you got for me?? One irl meeting and now the cat’s got your tongue. Weak._ _  
_ (4:12)  
_;)_

(4:17)  
Now I remember why I was afraid of you.

(4:19)  
_There he is._ _  
_ (4:19)  
_I miss you._

(4:21)  
You just saw me yesterday :)

(4:22)  
_Not enough!!!!!!_ _  
_ (4:22)  
_We have six months worth of time to make up!!!!_

(4:24)  
I’m glad I haven’t scared you away.

(4:25)  
_You better be joking, Spence. You’re gonna have to try harder if you want to get rid of me._ _  
_ (4:25)  
_Also you didn’t tell me you were so goddamn cute!!_

(4:29)  
Probably because it isn’t true.

(4:31)  
_Oh shut up, you dingus._ _  
_ (4:31)  
_You are a pretty, pretty person._

(4:33)  
I think that’s you.

(4:34)  
_Wow, pocket-agent. Cool it with the compliments._

(4:36)  
Never.  
(4:36)  
I already knew that you were beautiful, but now I have a face to put to all that beauty.

(4:37)  
_Oh, Spencer._

(4:38)  
What?

(4:39)  
_I am absolutely still obsessed with you._

(4:41)  
Does that mean you’ll go on a date with me?

(4:42)  
_I thought you would never ask :)_ _  
_ (4:42)  
_Can we go on *all* of the dates?_

(4:44)  
*All* of the dates?

(4:45)  
_Yes._

(4:47)  
Yes.  
(4:47)  
What do you want to do?

(4:49)  
_Anything._

(4:51)  
Anything? That’s a lot of trust.

(4:52)  
_I don’t care what we do, as long as I’m with you._

(4:53)  
Wow, you never told me you were such a sap.

(4:54)  
_You bring out the best in me :)_

(4:56)  
I think that’s me with you.

(4:57)  
_God, Spence. I’m so glad we finally met._ _  
_ (4:57)  
_I know you said you’re not mad at me for ambushing you, I hope you really mean that._

(5:00)  
I do. I couldn’t be mad at you for that.  
(5:01)  
I’ve wanted to meet you for so long. You were right, I was just scared.  
(5:01)  
I wouldn’t change a thing about yesterday. It was perfect.

(5:03)  
_Good._ _  
_ (5:03)  
_When can I see your beautiful face again!!!_

(5:05)  
You’re so cute.

(5:07)  
_Shut up, I’m gonna get a big head._

(5:09)  
Bigger than you already have?

(5:10)  
_Using my words against me again!!! Mean little man._

(5:12)  
Hey, you can’t call me little anymore! I am no longer solely associated with your phone.

(5:13)  
_Ugh, fine._ _  
_ (5:13)  
_So when’s our date??_

(5:15)  
I just got called into work, but as soon as I’m back?

(5:16)  
_Hell yes._

(5:18)  
I love the enthusiasm.

(5:19)  
_I love your stupid face._

(5:20)  
Hey! I thought it was a pretty face?

(5:21)  
_Stupid pretty._  
(5:22)  
_Stay safe, Spence. Come back to me in one piece._

(5:25)  
Anything for you.

*****

 **Sun 11 Apr (5:42pm)** **  
** :)))))))))))

(5:44)  
**Spencer!!!!!!**

(5:45)  
:))))))))))))))))))))))))

(5:46)  
**Yes yes yes!!!** **  
** (5:46)  
**I’m fistpumping if you can’t tell <333  
  
*******

 **Tues 13 Apr (10:52pm)** **  
** I’m gonna be sick. 

(10:54)  
**You good, hot stuff??? What’s up?**

(10:55)  
I have never seen Reid this fucking giddy.   
(10:55)  
It’s disgusting. 

(10:56)  
**It’s love!!!!** **  
** (10:56)  
**It’s the absolute best :))**

(10:58)  
Yeah, it is.   
(10:58)  
We make an excellent team, mama. 

(11:00)  
**Understatement of the goddamn century!!!!** **  
** (11:01)  
**We make the *hottest* team.**

(11:02)  
Facts.  
  
*****

 **Wed 14 Apr (2:51am)** **  
** _Do you think Nikola and Edgar can learn to coexist?_

(2:55)  
I love that this is what you’re thinking of at 3 in the morning.  
(2:55)  
And I certainly think they can. Nikola’s not quite as appetizing as a typical fish.  
  
(2:56)  
_It’s important!! For…. future purposes._ _  
_ (2:56)  
_I hope that doesn’t weird you out._

(2:57)  
You always weird me out.

(2:57)  
_Wow, you’re *so* fucking mean!!!_

(2:58)  
You know that I’m joking.

(2:58)  
_Of course I do._

(2:59)  
And no, it doesn’t weird me out.  
(2:59)  
The “future purposes.”  
(3:00)  
Quite the opposite in fact.

(3:01)  
_Good. I know we only met like 5 days ago but…  
_ (3:01)  
_Ya know?_

(3:02)  
I know.

(3:03)  
_I’ll be sure not to tell Nikola that you don’t think he’s that appetizing by the way._ _  
_ (3:03)  
_I think he would be offended._

(3:04)  
You don’t even know him!

(3:05)  
_Oh my god… I just realized… I get to MEET Nikola!!!!!!!_

(3:06)  
You seem more excited to meet him than me.

(3:06)  
_It’s because I am._

(3:07)  
God, I can’t stand you.

(3:08)  
_Aw, Spence!!! I can’t stand you either!! <3 _

(3:09)  
<3

(3:09)  
_Wow, and you even stoop to my level with the heart emoji!!_ _  
_ (3:09)  
_You really do care._

(3:10)  
Yeah, I really do. **  
** **  
** ***** **  
** **  
** **Thurs 15 Apr (9:23pm)** **  
** _Hurry upppppppp._

(9:48)  
Miss me?

(9:51)  
_You know I do._

(9:53)  
I wish I was back.

(9:57)  
_Hopefully soon?_

(10:01)  
Yeah. Hopefully.

*****

 **Fri 16 Apr (1:38pm)** **  
** **Hey, sweetie!**

(2:12)  
_Penny!!! What’s up??_

(2:15)  
**I just wanted to give you a heads up that the team’s coming back tonight. And it’s been a rough case.** **  
** (2:15)  
**I had a feeling Boy Genius wouldn’t want to tell you the bad stuff.**

(2:17)  
_Ugh, this boy. So stubborn._ _  
_ (2:17)  
_Thanks for letting me know. Are you alright??_

(2:19)  
**Yeah, I’ll be okay. Nothing we haven’t seen before.**

(2:21)  
_Girl’s night when you’re off next? Anything you like :)_

(2:23)  
**I freaking love you. Yes!!**

(2:26)  
_I got a great package deal when Spence started this whole mess. <3 _

(2:27)  
**Best wrong text ever.**

(2:28)  
_Now that’s just the truest statement of all time._

*****

 **Fri 16 Apr (9:13pm)** **  
** _How’s it going?_

(9:46)  
It’s alright.

(9:48)  
_I feel like you’re lying to me._

(9:51)  
You scare me.  
(9:51)  
It was a tough case.

(9:53)  
_Wanna tell me about it?_

(9:56)  
No, I don’t want to bother you with all of that.

(9:57)  
_Spencer._

(9:58)  
Y/N.

(10:00)  
_You’re so goddamn stubborn. Remember what I said about not keeping it in? You can still tell me anything. Or not. But I’ll be there for you whatever you choose._ _  
_ (10:01)  
_Are you almost home?_

(10:03)  
Yeah, about ten minutes away.

(10:05)  
_Good._ _  
_ (10:05)  
_I’m already here._

*****

 **Sun 18 Apr (10:47pm)** **  
** Hey, Reid, help me settle a bet.   
(10:47)  
What are the stats for pineapple on pizza? 

(11:03)  
I’m sorry, Doctor Spencer Reid cannot come to the phone right now, he’s too busy kissijafskldjfiwejfkaslkvnzocjxvoijwfg

(11:05)  
Hi, Y/N.   
(11:05)  
I like you already. 

(11:06)  
Hi Derek!!!!!  
(11:06)  
Thank you for all of your scheming, I kind of owe you and Pen my entire life.

(11:08)  
Anything for Pretty Boy. Glad it worked out ;) 

(11:09)  
He sure is pretty. And he’s totally going to kill me when he gets his phone back.  
(11:09)  
I hope you’re down for that double date.

(11:10)  
Penelope’s been talking my ear off about this, we are so ready.   
  
(11:11)  
Oh my god, it’ll be three versus one with giving Spence a hard time…. I’ve heard all about you, Derek.  
(11:11)  
We’re gonna be great friends.  
  
(11:12)  
Oh, hell yeah. 

(11:13)  
You’ll have to wait a little for that date though.  
(11:13)  
Just until I’m ready to share him.

*****

 **Fri 8 May (11:14pm)** **  
** You got a good one, Reid.   
(11:14)  
You better hold onto her. 

(11:15)  
I was planning on it.

(11:16)  
And Pen was right. 

(11:17)  
About what?

(11:18)  
She looks at you like you hung the stars in the sky. 

(11:19)  
Oh shut up!!!  
(11:19)  
This is why we can’t have nice things.

(11:20)  
I’m being serious. 

(11:21)  
Oh.  
(11:21)  
:)

(11:22)  
You two are gross. 

(11:23)  
Aaaaaand there it is.  
  
*****

 **Thurs 30 Sept (9:53am)**  
It’s almost time. We need to start planning.

(9:55)  
_Who the fuck is this?_

(9:56)  
:-/  
(9:56)  
Just wanted to recreate our first conversation.  
(9:56)  
Now that we’re “in love and all that bullshit” as you so kindly say.

(9:57)  
_It’s just the truth!!!! We’re in love….and all that bullshit <3 _

(9:57)  
And you have to go and ruin it with “who the fuck is this?”

(9:58)  
_Imagine if I had said that the first time! You would have never spoken to me again!_

(9:58)  
Not true. I think it would have happened one way or the other. Fate and destiny and all that stuff you’re always talking about.

(9:59)  
_You big freaking softy. What happened to Dr. Facts and Statistics and Things that are Proveable?_

(10:00)  
You did once say that you’d get me to believe in magic yet. I think it’s safe to say that I do.

(10:01)  
_You’re so goddamn cute. Is this why you told me to stay in bed??? So you can text me from the kitchen?_ _  
_ (10:01)  
_I thought you were making me pancakes!!!_

(10:02)  
I can multitask.

(10:02)  
_Can you though?_

(10:03)  
I’m glad nothing’s changed over the last year.

(10:04)  
_God. A whole entire year._ _  
_ (10:04)  
_I think I’m the luckiest person in the world._

(10:05)  
Nope.  
(10:05)  
That’s me.

(10:06)  
_Nauseating!!!_ _  
_ (10:06)  
_You better not be burning my pancakes!!!_

(10:06)  
*Your* pancakes?

(10:07)  
_Are they banana chocolate chip?_

(10:07)  
Of course they are. Do you know me?

(10:08)  
_Okay fine, you can have some too._

(10:08)  
Wow, I’m honored.

(10:09)  
_Anything for the love of my life._

(10:09)  
Wow, now I’m *really* honored. Laying it on thick today, you must really want those pancakes.

(10:10)  
_Well, at least until I find naked xylophone man. He might steal your spot as #1._

(10:10)  
And there it is. You are the worst.

(10:11)  
_I know for a fact that’s not true. Also I can hear you laughing from here._ _  
_ (10:11)  
_Get your cute little butt back here, pocket-agent. I need to smother you._

(10:11)  
Smother me?!!!

(10:12)  
_Yes with love and kisses._

(10:12)  
Nauseating. 

(10:12)  
_And? What of it?_

(10:13)  
And I wouldn’t have it any other way.  
(10:13)  
On my way, pocket-librarian.

(10:14)  
_You better be bringing those pancakes!_

(10:14)  
Of course, dear.  
(10:14)  
Thank you for the best year of my life.

(10:15)  
_Aw baby, this is just the beginning._  
(10:15)  
_:)_

(10:15)  
(:


End file.
